考研英语作文批改命题趋势越来越关注社会热点与考生思辨能力。本文带来的2016年考研英语一批改范例,透过图表/图画深挖现象背后的本质,由启航教育老师逐段精批,可帮助考生建立稳定的考研英语写作思维框架。
一、考研英语一2016年大作文题目
考研英语一2016年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2016年大作文批改例文
Emerging from the illustrative cartoons is a thought-provoking scene :in the left picture,a child is sitting aside the desk with grievance while his father is watching TV and smoking with his words "Son,should study hard for me".And in the right picture,they are studying together on their own tables until the midnight.Without any doubt, the captoon is trying to send us a message that "Instead of making demands, it"s better to set an example".
Almost all parents hope their children study hard and become an excellent person when they grow up.However, it is not realistic because children can be influenced by adults" behaviors.When adults only make demands on children but fail to set an example themselves,this action will cause the psychological imbalance in children.To be contrast,they will change their attitude to the study if parents make consistent commitment to learning with them.
From my perspective,if parents have some requirements for children,they need reduce the leisure and accompany with children when he is studying.There is not an excuse for extainment to children.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:should
批改:前缺少主语you
原文:they
批改:改成:the father and his son
原文:captoon
批改:cartoon
原文:Emerging from the illustrative cartoons is a thought-provoking scene :in the left picture,a child is sitting aside the desk with grievance while his father is watching TV and smoking with his words "Son,should study hard for me".And in the right picture,they are studying together on their own tables until the midnight.Without any doubt, the captoon is trying to send us a message that "Instead of making demands, it"s better to set an example".
批改:能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象,并能够直接点明作文的主题。
批改:加to
原文:Almost all parents hope their children study hard and become an excellent person when they grow up.However, it is not realistic because children can be influenced by adults" behaviors.When adults only make demands on children but fail to set an example themselves,this action will cause the psychological imbalance in children.To be contrast,they will change their attitude to the study if parents make consistent commitment to learning with them.
批改:该段落能够将图画背后蕴含的真实意义加以阐述,语言衔接连贯。
原文:he is
批改:their children are
批改:加to
原文:extainment
批改:entertainment?
原文:From my perspective,if parents have some requirements for children,they need reduce the leisure and accompany with children when he is studying.There is not an excuse for extainment to children.
批改:起到了呼吁和号召的作用,注意避免小的语言错误。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14/20
内容切题,全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意避免拼写错误;句式方面和语法方面,要注意句子结构的完整,不要缺少成分;逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的比较认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节性错误会更好。继续加油。
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