思想品质、教育文化是考研英语大作文的高频命题方向,本文呈现的2013年考研英语一批改范例正是聚焦这一主旨。启航教育老师透过文章结构、衔接表达和结尾升华三方面,逐段展示了一篇考研英语写作冲刺高分范文的诞生过程。
一、考研英语一2013年大作文题目
考研英语一2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly, 2) interpret its intended meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2013年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there are a group of graduate students gathering and four choices emerged in front of them are going abroad, being an entrepreneur, choosing further education and finding jobs. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that it is different choices that play an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound social system, enabling university students to have ample opportunities and chances to choose the way which makes their worlds shine with renewed brilliance. On the other hand, in the modern society full of chances, changes and challenges, a right option is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run. Neglecting option is like a heavy chain that hinders students’ progress, preventing them from shining brightly in future society.
In brief, a suitable option is the catalyst for personal development, for which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop individual potential and fulfill our aspirations.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:different
批改:此处改为正向的词汇,suitable 更合适
批改:语法正确
批改:语法正确
原文: option
批改:可数名词单数形式不能单独存在,改为 a right option
批改:此处写为 做出一个正确的选择的意义或者好处 会更好
批改:内容表达不错,也比较具体
原文:for
批改:此处为 from
批改:结尾段内容表达很好
原文:are
批改: "a group" 是一个单数集合名词,因此动词应该使用单数形式 "is"。
原文:students
批改:加逗号
原文:four choices emerged in front of them are
批改:改为 facing four choices, such as
批改:图画内容表达很清晰,主题词的表达要更精准一点
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14分/20分
题目要求:总体上来说是切题的,表明了个人观点,和图画的内容很贴合
语言表达:存在几处语法问题,词汇表达不错,一些句式也很好
结构逻辑:文章的结构完整清晰,内容也比较丰富具体
修改建议:1. 语法和内容表达问题结合作文批注仔细修改,要细心 2. 首段的主题词要表达精确。之后可以多积累素材,自己多练练句子,进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备,提高自己的语言表达,总的来说写的不错,加油!
启航教育考研英语批改服务累计已帮助众多考生实现写作提分。本文精解的2013年考研英语一范文,正是来自启航教育写作批改的真实案例。想要获得同样专业的批改,扫描页面二维码或在线咨询即可预约考研英语写作冲刺免费批改名额。
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