启航教育在考研英语写作教学中反复强调:词汇与句式的高级化是考研英语作文高分的关键。本文整理的2013年考研英语一批改范例,几乎每一段都包含高分替换词与衔接词,是考研英语一真题写作锦囊中的代表性范文。
一、考研英语一2013年大作文题目
考研英语一2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly, 2) interpret its intended meaning, and3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2013年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there is a group of graduates, standing on the way of life and facing different life choices ,which looking for jobs, continuing study, going abroad, and starting a business. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that it is choosing a suitable path that plays an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, choosing a suitable path can ignite our creativity, and promote personal growth and self-tufillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. What is more, choosing a suitable path holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength, further propelling social stability and sustainable development.
In brief, choosing a suitable path is the catalyst for socictal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop individual pstential, fulfill our aspirations, and make our world shine with renewed brilliance.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:shown in the cartoon, there is a group of graduates, standing on the way of life and facing different life choices ,which looking for jobs, continuing study, going abroad, and starting a business. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that it is choosing a suitable path that plays an important and positive role both in our personal lives and in society.
批改:你成功描述了图画的基本场景并列举了具体选择,结尾句也清晰地点明了文章主旨。
原文:which looking for jobs, continu
批改:which looking for jobs...” 这个定语从句结构不完整,应改为 “including job hunting, pursuing further studies, going abroad, and starting businesses”。
原文:s phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, choosing a suitable path can ignite our creativity, and promote personal growth and self-tufillment, thus making life rewarding and meaningful, rather than being self-consuming. What is more, choosing a suitable path holds exceptional significance for a nation, as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for boosting overall national strength, further propelling social stability and sustainable development.
批改:本段从个人发展和社会进步两个层面论证,思路开阔,体现了你良好的思辨能力。
原文: self-tufillment
批改:“self-tufillment” 拼写错误,应为 “self-fulfillment”。
原文:henomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, choosing a suitable path can ignite our creativity, and promote personal growth and self-tufillment, thus making lif
批改:第一个论点中,“ignite our creativity” 与“选择合适道路”之间的逻辑关联可以加强。可以补充说明合适的选择是如何激发创造力的,例如:“A well-aligned path provides the motivation and conducive environment for creative thinking to flourish.” 第二个论点的论述非常出色,“crucial cornerstone”的比喻用得很贴切。
原文:rief, choosing a suitable path is the catalyst for socictal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice. Only by doing so can we develop individual pstential, fulfill our aspirations, and make our world shine with renewed brilliance.
批改:结尾段总结有力,再次点题,并使用了“catalyst”等高级词汇。“renewed brilliance”的表述也很有文采。
原文:socictal and personal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should activ
批改:socictal” 拼写错误,应为 “societal”。“pstential” 拼写错误,应为 “potential”。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:15分
总评:
你的文章结构稳固,立意深刻,论证清晰,并且能使用高级词汇和复杂句式。主要的提升空间在于进一步提升语言细节的精准度,并确保核心概念在全文中的一致性。
完成最后的“检查”步骤。 文中的几个拼写错误(如fulfillment, societal, potential)都是可以通过仔细检查避免的。
对每一位2027考研人而言,考研英语一真题都是冲刺阶段必须攻克的难关。启航教育陪伴一届又一届学子走向考研英语写作高分,本文精解的2013年考研英语一范文正是经典参考之一。欢迎关注启航教育,了解更多考研英语备考干货。
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