2013年考研英语二大作文实例分析与批改

2013年考研英语二大作文围绕哪一类话题命题？本文精选的范文聚焦考研英语二大作文话题方向，结合启航教育多年考研英语二教学沉淀，从描述图表、解读寓意到发表评论三大角度，完整呈现高分作文的内在结构。

一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart above clearly shows school student"s part-time job.

It can be seen that senior student account for the largest part, with the proportion of 88.24%, following by third-year student at the school and second-year student at the school which takes up 71.93% & 71.13% respectively. In contrast, first-year student at the school only occupies a minor proportion of 67.77%.

What the statistics reflect is closely related to the following factors. First of all, with economic development, students in mounting numbers begin to change their view, laying emphasis on comprehensive development, arising for job experience. What"s more, life concept factors also prove responsible for this phenomenon in that people are able knowledge to benefit of job through the web, which exerts significant influence on their behavior. Last but not least, the positive guidance of the governmental policies on prompting student to job is another key factor which can"t be ignored.

Based on the statistics and analysis above, we may reasonably predict that the phenomenon is normal and positive and therefore I firmly believe that it is bound to continue in the years to come.

三、考研英语作文批改

批改：这里不用分段

原文：student"s

批改：要用复数所有格students"

原文：job

批改：要用复数 jobs

原文：school

批改：按题意应该是大学生，改为university，另外前面应补充the proportion of，改为 the proportion of university

原文：student

批改：要用复数 students

原文：student

批改：要用复数 students

原文：second-year student

批改：要用复数sophomores

原文：third-year

批改：junior

原文：first-year student

批改：要用复数freshmen

原文：contrast

批改：这里没有明显的对比，可改为addition

原文：following

批改：要用被动语态 followed

原文：takes

批改：主语是复数，应该用原型take

原文：&

批改：and

原文：school

批改：同前文，university

原文：school

批改：同前文，university

原文：school

批改：同前文，university

原文：occupies

批改：主语是复数，要用原型occupy

原文：The bar chart above clearly shows school student"s part-time job. It can be seen that senior student account for the largest part, with the proportion of 88.24%, following by third-year student at the school and second-year student at the school which takes up 71.93% & 71.13% respectively. In contrast, first-year student at the school only occupies a minor proportion of 67.77%.

批改：描述了图标内容，注意语法问题和用词的准确性

原文：arising for

批改：表达有误，可改为seeking（寻求）

原文：knowledge

批改：成分残缺，前面要补充to acquire

原文：to benefit

批改：多余，应删除

原文：prompting student to job

批改：表达有误，可改为encouraging students to take part-time jobs

原文：and therefore

批改：句子有点长，建议改为句号+Therefore,

原文：What the statistics reflect is closely related to the following factors. First of all, with economic development, students in mounting numbers begin to change their view, laying emphasis on comprehensive development, arising for job experience. What"s more, life concept factors also prove responsible for this phenomenon in that people are able knowledge to benefit of job through the web, which exerts significant influence on their behavior. Last but not least, the positive guidance of the governmental policies on prompting student to job is another key factor which can"t be ignored.

批改：从经济发展、学生观念、政策倡导三方面展开分析，注意个别语法问题

原文：Based on the statistics and analysis above, we may reasonably predict that the phenomenon is normal and positive and therefore I firmly believe that it is bound to continue in the years to come.

批改：观点表达不够明确，只说了会在未来几年持续，可改为在未来几年比例持续升高，这样会更明确

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：6/15

题目要求：对图表内容表述全面，个人观点应再明确一些；论述内容符合题意；

语言表达：全文用了一些经典句式，但语法错误和拼写错误也较多，表达效果有待提高；

行文逻辑：第一段描述题干内容，第二段给出详细论述，第三段表达观点，架构完整；

修改建议：改正原文错误；优化个人观点；继续积累经典句式；加强语法练习；加强单词复习；

同学还有进步的空间，要加油啊~

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