考研英语一2011年大作文怎么写？附例文批改

思想品质、教育文化是考研英语大作文的高频命题方向，本文呈现的2011年考研英语一批改范例正是聚焦这一主旨。启航教育老师透过文章结构、衔接表达和结尾升华三方面，逐段展示了一篇考研英语写作冲刺高分范文的诞生过程。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon,there are two tourists,sitting on the boat and throwing rubbish into the lake,while enjoying the scenery.Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal life and in society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are particularly significant.First and fore most.Tragically,although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon.its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals have neglected the hazards of littering and piling up the garbage randomly.What"s more.A good ecological environment holds exceotional significance for a nation,as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for providing us with stable habitats and necessary resources,further propelling the social stability and sustainable development.

How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package of deal,including issuing relevant regulation and enhancing supervision,but would those measures be comprehensive enough?In reality, we also need to strengthen the moral education,especially regarding environment protection.With the support of those measures,we can effectively tackle the issue at its core

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：As shown in the cartoon,there are two tourists,sitting on the boat and throwing rubbish into the lake,while enjoying the scenery.

批改：此句描述了漫画中的基本场景，语句通顺，用“As shown in the cartoon”引出描述，较为自然。

原文：Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal life and in society.

批改：意图理解基本正确，但“convey readers”表述有误，应是“convey to readers”

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are particularly significant.

批改：此句起到过渡作用，引出下文对现象的深入分析，逻辑较清晰。

原文：First and fore most.Tragically,although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon.its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals have neglected the hazards of littering and piling up the garbage randomly.

批改：“First and fore most.”标点使用错误；“Tragically”在此处使用不当，与语境不符；“although”引导的让步状语从句后缺少连接词

原文：What"s more.A good ecological environment holds exceotional significance for a nation,as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for providing us with stable habitats and necessary resources,further propelling the social stability and sustainable development.

批改：“What"s more.”标点错误；“exceotional”拼写错误，应是“exceptional”；句子整体较长，但逻辑较清晰，阐述了良好生态环境的重要性。

原文：How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package of deal,including issuing relevant regulation and enhancing supervision,but would those measures be comprehensive enough?

批改：此句提出问题并给出部分解决措施，逻辑较连贯。“regulation”应用复数形式。

原文：In reality, we also need to strengthen the moral education,especially regarding environment protection.With the support of those measures,we can effectively tackle the issue at its core

批改：进一步提出加强道德教育的措施，逻辑合理。

原文：As shown in the cartoon,there are two tourists,sitting on the boat and throwing rubbish into the lake,while enjoying the scenery.Evidently,the cartoonist intends to convey readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal life and in society

批改：成功描述了漫画场景并初步阐述了漫画意图

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways,but two of them are particularly significant.First and fore most.Tragically,although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon.its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals have neglected the hazards of littering and piling up the garbage randomly.What"s more.A good ecological environment holds exceotional significance for a nation,as it serves as a crucial cornerstone for providing us with stable habitats and necessary resources,further propelling the social stability and sustainable development

批改：尝试对现象进行深入分析，提出了两个重要方面

原文：How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package of deal,including issuing relevant regulation and enhancing supervision,but would those measures be comprehensive enough?In reality, we also need to strengthen the moral education,especially regarding environment protection.With the support of those measures,we can effectively tackle the issue at its core

批改：提出了解决环境污染问题的措施，逻辑较连贯

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11/20

题目要求：对漫画意图的解释有一定合理性，指出“environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal life and in society”，抓住了漫画想要传达的关于环境污染需重视的核心信息。能够针对环境污染问题提出一些解决措施，如“issuing relevant regulation and enhancing supervision”“strengthen the moral education”，展现出了一定的思考和解决问题的能力。

语言表达：语法错误较为明显，例如“convey readers”应改为“convey to readers”；“First and fore most.”标点使用错误且表达不规范，正确的是“First and foremost”；“although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon.its root cause...”中，although 引导的句子与后面句子缺乏恰当连接，造成句子结构混乱。

修改建议：加强英语基础知识的学习，包括拼写、语法和词汇。可以通过背诵单词、做语法练习题、阅读优秀范文等方式来提高语言能力。同时，要注重积累同义词和近义词，丰富自己的词汇量，使文章表达更加多样化。在写作过程中，要认真检查拼写和语法错误，提高语言的准确性。加油！

启航教育考研英语批改服务累计已帮助众多考生实现写作提分。本文精解的2011年考研英语一范文，正是来自启航教育写作批改的真实案例。想要获得同样专业的批改，扫描页面二维码或在线咨询即可预约考研英语写作冲刺免费批改名额。