考研英语一2024年大作文真题与例文批改

2024年考研英语一大作文属于典型的图表作文，要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例，完整覆盖考研英语一作文范文常考图表的描述思路，是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。

一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目

考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文

In the left-hand picture, there are some people, running in the park, while a boy saying:"The newly-built park near my home is excellent." Simultaneously, in the right-hand chart, the number of the parks in a certain city experienced a significant increase of 263 from 2020 to 2022.

The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous to build many parks, enabling the people to exercise and relax themselves. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancenent of society, people are no longer content with mere material satisfaction; they also persue healthy body. This explains why an increasing number of people choose exercise in the park rather than in home. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What about the future trends? I am confident that the number of parks is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：saying

批改：此处为从句的谓语，saying 不是谓语动词，改为 says

批改：开头段表达不错，清晰地阐述了图画和图表的内容

批改：语法正确

原文：tremendous

批改：此处为名词短语，改为 tremendous efforts

批改：语法正确

原文：themselves

批改：删去，relax 本身已包含“使自己放松”的意思，通常不需要再加反身代词。

原文：the

批改：删去，people 前面不加 the

批改：内容表达很好，也很具体

批改：语法正确，表达也不错

原文： choose exercise

批改：动词 "choose" 后接具体活动时，更地道的搭配是 choose to do sth, 改为 choose to exercise

原文：in

批改：改为 at

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15分/20分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明了个人观点，和图画的内容很贴合

语言表达：存在几处语法问题，词汇表达不错，一些句式也很好

结构逻辑：文章的结构完整清晰，内容也比较丰富具体

修改建议：语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改，要细心。之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的语言表达，总的来说写的不错，加油！

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