考研英语一2011年大作文失分点批改

据启航教育英语教研组统计，考研英语写作模板话题连续多年成为考研英语一大作文的高频考点。本文带来的2011年考研英语一批改例文中，考生通过对社会热点的精准分析与地道表达，获得高分，其写作思路可供2027考研英语一考生直接借鉴。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

As shown in the cartoon, there are two tourists sitting in the boat, and throwing rubbish into the lake, which deteriorates the lake’s environment. Evidently the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, tragically although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals, in their pursuit of economic interests, have disregarded the virtue of integrity. What is more, environment polluting that is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image .

How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including issuing related regulations, and enhancing supervision. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we need to strengthen moral education, and to foster the virtue of protecting environment deliberately .With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：As shown in the cartoon, there are two tourists sitting in the boat, and throwing rubbish into the lake, which deteriorates the lake’s environment. Evidently the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.

批改：描述漫画内容，揭示漫画背后所反映的社会现象和深刻哲理，清晰直观。

原文：that

批改：删除

原文：This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, tragically although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals, in their pursuit of economic interests, have disregarded the virtue of integrity. What is more, environment polluting that is like a heavy chain that hinders our nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image .

批改：以分论点的形式论述污染环境的危害，逻辑严谨，层次分明。

原文：How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including issuing related regulations, and enhancing supervision. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we need to strengthen moral education, and to foster the virtue of protecting environment deliberately .With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.

批改：总结全文，升华主题，展望未来，立意深远。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：19/20

作文对漫画的理解到位，写作思路紧扣主题，有些短语句式的表达也不错，基本能够传达清楚作者的写作意图，但在以下几方面还需注意：

1.语法：个别句子从汉语角度看意思通顺，仔细分析其实句子成分不完整，不符合英语表达方式。

2.细节：考试时可以多积累高级词汇，写作文就能用上，但尤其注意单词拼写不要出现明显错误，特别是与主题词相关的单词要重点留意。

3.内容：这幅漫画中细节比较多，但最核心的内容比较明确，那就是旅游过程中游客的不恰当行为造成环境污染。该图显示水面上有一艘观光船，两个游客随手乱扔垃圾，水面上漂浮着各种各样的废弃物。很多考生拿到试卷后的第一反应就是写如何保护环境，再细心一点的考生就写成如何保护景区环境。可是，这幅图不仅要强调被破坏的环境，还要强调造成这种环境污染的缘由——游客甚至是人类的不恰当行为。这样表达文章意思才全面。

整体来看，作文理解了漫画内涵，段落框架明确，大体上与题目要求保持一致，后续继续注重练习，加油！

复习考研英语大作文，务必要重视范文精读+专业批改的双向结合。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班，专为冲刺阶段考生打造，从话题预测到写作模板一应俱全，是考研英语写作模板写作提分的可靠方案。