进入冲刺阶段,每一份考研英语写作技巧写作资料都弥足珍贵。本文整理的2024年考研英语一批改范例,由启航教育写作主讲亲自精批,已标注高分句型与失分雷区。无论你是考研英语一一还是考研英语一二考生,都能从中找到提分灵感。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
In the left-hand picture, there is a man, watching others exercise, and saying that it is pretty nice for the brand-new parks. In the right-hand picture, the bar chart clearly depicts the number of parks in a certain city in the past three years. In 2020, the number of parks was 406, but by 2022, this figure had substantially risen to 670.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound healthy system, enabling people to have ample opportunities for exercise. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:brand-new parks. In the right-hand picture, the bar chart clearly depicts the number of parks in a certain city in the past three years. In 2020, the number of parks was 406, but by 2022, this figure had substantially risen to 670.
批改:第一段成功地完成了对两幅图的描述任务,信息点提取全面、准确。
原文:r orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound healthy system, enabling people to have ample opportunities for exercise. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:本段的原因分析是你的强项,视角宏观,逻辑清晰
原文: trends? I am confident that the number of parks is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following
批改:结尾段简洁、有力,自信地展望了未来,并赋予了现象积极的社会意义,圆满地结束了全文。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:17
同学,你这篇作文的质量非常高!它最突出的优点在于:结构严谨,逻辑自洽,并且能运用比喻等修辞手法来提升语言的表现力。你对“政府主导”和“后疫情时代健康意识”这两个原因的分析,切中要害,体现了你对社会现象的观察力和理解力。
你的作文已经具备了冲击高分的绝大多数要素。如果希望在细节上追求卓越,老师建议你关注以下两点:
可以有意识地地将一些口语化或宽泛的表达(如 pretty nice, healthy system),替换为更正式、更精准的词汇。a sound healthy system 的搭配可以优化为 a sound fitness infrastructure(完善的健身基础设施)或 robust public health system
专业批改是考研英语写作提分直接有效的方式之一。启航教育提供由资深讲师亲批的免费批改服务,针对考研英语一大作文逐句逐段给出修改建议。完成本文精读之后,欢迎将你的作文提交给启航教育,享受考研英语写作技巧高分批改。
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