进入冲刺阶段,每一份考研英语写作技巧写作资料都弥足珍贵。本文整理的2024年考研英语一批改范例,由启航教育写作主讲亲自精批,已标注高分句型与失分雷区。无论你是考研英语一一还是考研英语一二考生,都能从中找到提分灵感。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
As is vividly illustrated by this cartoon given above, a garden in which citizens can do sports and relax, is built recently in front of their houses. In this chart, we can figure out that the number of parks in certain city displays a increasing thend over the period from 2020 to 2022. It is self-evident that park is playing an important role in development of the city.
Several factors could weigh heavily for the influence of parks in the city. To begin with, parks allow people to do physical exercises which is more convenient for them to keep fit and enhance their sense of happiness. Addtionally, it is beneficial to the environment when parks bring lots of plants that are good for the air, instead of endless development with pollution.
Given the factors that I have outlined above, it is wise to draw a conclusion that more parks should be built while developing the city. As a result, not only the citizens, but the whole society need such a positive and healthy atmospheve as well.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:ys a increasing t
批改:a increasing thend -> an increasing trend (拼写错误,且元音开头前应用 an) certain city -> a certain city (缺少冠词)
原文:idly illustrated by this cartoon given above, a garden in which citizens can do sports and relax, is built recently in front of their houses. In this chart, we can figure out that the number of parks in certain city displays a increasing thend over the period from 2020 to 2022. It is self-evident that park is playing an important role in development of t
批改:你成功地将漫画与图表信息结合起来,并提炼出了核心观点
原文:weigh heavily for the influence of parks in the city. To begin with, parks allow people to do physical exercises which is more convenient for them to keep fit and enhance their sense of happiness. Addtionally, it is beneficial to the environment when parks bring lots of plants that are good f
批改:weigh heavily for the influence 这个搭配稍显生硬,可以优化为更地道的 account for the positive impact。 Addtionally -> Additionally (拼写错误) exercises which is -> exercises, which are (定语从句的谓语动词应与先行词 exercises 保持一致)
原文:w people to do physical exercises which is more convenient for them to keep fit and enhance their sense of happiness. Addtionally, it is beneficial to the environment when parks bring lots of plants that are good for the air, instead of endless development with pollution.
批改:这真是一段非常扎实的论证!你的分析紧扣主题,逻辑清晰
原文:althy atmospheve
批改:atmospheve -> atmosphere (拼写错误) 语法与表达: not only the citizens, but the whole society need 存在主谓不一致错误。not only A, but (also) B 结构遵循“就近原则”,谓语动词应与B (the whole society) 保持一致,故应改为 needs。
原文:n the factors that I have outlined above, it is wise to draw a conclusion that more parks should be built while developing the city. As a result, not only the citizens, but the whole society need such a positive and healthy atmospheve as well.
批改:结尾段成功总结了前文,并提出了有力的倡议
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16
最突出的优点在于结构严谨、论点清晰、逻辑自洽。你对公园社会价值和环境价值的分析都非常到位。
你的作文已经具备了冲击高分的绝大多数要素。如果希望在细节上追求卓越,老师建议你关注以下两点:
追求极致的准确性:请特别留意名词单复数、主谓一致以及高频词汇的拼写。在完成写作后,留出1-2分钟快速检查这些细节,能立刻提升
优化句式多样性:可以尝试在段落开头使用更多样的句式,例如用名词性短语(如 The benefits of parks are twofold.)来替代 Several factors...,更灵活。
专业批改是考研英语写作提分直接有效的方式之一。启航教育提供由资深讲师亲批的免费批改服务,针对考研英语一大作文逐句逐段给出修改建议。完成本文精读之后,欢迎将你的作文提交给启航教育,享受考研英语写作技巧高分批改。
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