2024年考研英语一大作文的评分标准严格,对图表描述、主题提炼与观点阐述三大能力均有考查。本文精选的这篇高分批改范例,全程贯彻考研英语一大作文写作锦囊的核心要点,可作为考研英语写作的标杆范文。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
In the left-hand cartoon, there is a boy standing in a park and saying that the park near our home is very nice, while many people are running. The right-hand bar chart clearly depicts the number of parks in a certain city in the recent three years. In 2020, the number of the park was 406, but by 2022, the figure had substantially risen to 670.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to establish the park, which serve as a means of promoting and improving public health. In addition, as we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people’s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart and cartoon are unsurprising.
What about future treads? I am confident that the number of the park is a clear sign of social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:treads?
批改:trends
原文:the park
批改:parks 此处应用复数
原文:while many people are running
批改:优化:with many people jogging or exercising。jogging 更贴合公园休闲场景
批改:完整覆盖图画核心和图表数据,未遗漏关键信息,充分具体,切合题意。
原文:establish the park
批改:build more urban parks。establish 侧重 “建立组织 / 制度”,“build” 更贴合 “建设公园”;“urban parks” 明确 “城市公园”,更精准
原文: serve
批改:serves,此处which指代前面这件事,是单数
批改:尾段内容未来趋势进行了预测,切合逻辑,做到了与上文的顺畅衔接,整体表达合理。
批改:中间段落内容阐述角度符合题意,紧扣主题,论述层次清晰,逻辑合理且具有一定说服力;但要注意语言表达上的语法问题,如主谓一致、单复数。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14
评语:文章结构严谨有序,层次划分清晰,从图画描述到评论分析,每部分衔接紧密,无逻辑断层;内容上完整覆盖题干要求,核心要点无遗漏,论据选择贴合主题,能较为有效支撑观点,增强文章说服力;语言表达基本准确,虽存在个别细节语法疏漏(如单复数、主谓一致),但不影响核心意思传达。建议加强语法校对,进一步提升语言规范性。继续加油!
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