启航教育作为考研英语培训领域的知名品牌,每年都会整理发布当年的启航考研英语高分范文。本文呈现的2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文中,每一处失分点都已被老师精准订正,是2027考生不可错过的写作资料。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of different ways of exercise among the residents in a certain city. Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.3% , followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family members and group activities are also considered, account for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes, " On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, residents are compelled to confront immense. work pressure, and as a result, exercising along has emerged as their choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many exercise venues, enabling residents to exercise with their family and friends. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of residents, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:account
批改:accounting
原文:he bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of different ways of exercise among the residents in a certain city. Exercising alone takes the lead at 54.3% , followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family members and group activities are also considered, account for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.
批改:用具体数据描述图表内容,清晰直观,但是建议在段映的社会落后面补充这些数据反现象
批改:删除
原文:The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes, " On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, residents are compelled to confront immense. work pressure, and as a result, exercising along has emerged as their choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many exercise venues, enabling residents to exercise with their family and friends. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因,逻辑严谨,层次分明。
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of residents, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:总结全文,升华主题,展望未来,立意深远。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:13/15
这篇文章内容完整充实,结构清晰合理,逻辑严谨,层次分明,句型表达丰富。
语法:需要注意一些基础的语法问题和表达搭配问题,有时间好好看看文中的批改,细心吸收,争取在接下来的练习中避免类似的错误。
首段总体概括图表主题,呈现各锻炼方式的占比数据,突出独自锻炼占比最高这一核心特征。第二段原因分析,可从现代生活节奏快、个人时间安排灵活、社交网络有限等角度展开。第三段可结合当前趋势,合理推测未来锻炼方式的发展方向,如独自锻炼可能持续流行,同时建议增加家庭和团体锻炼以促进社交与健康。
文章整体来说,言简意赅,符合了考试写作提纲的要求,文章表示语义衔接的词语运用不太多,在以后的写作中可以多尝试使用一些表示衔接的词语,这样文章段落内部句内和段落之间的关系就能很明朗的表现出来。同时注意避免单纯罗列数据,可适当引用社会现象或政策背景支持分析,增强说服力。
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