2021年考研英语二大作文真题与例文批改

2021年考研英语二大作文属于典型的图表作文，要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例，完整覆盖考研英语二作文模板常考图表的描述思路，是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。

一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文

What a vivid column chart it is ! It describes a far-reaching phenomenon. According to a city"s investigation of residents" preferences on doing physical exercises. Most of them prefer to do sports alone which account for 54.3 percent. Accompanying with friends and having activities which occupy the 47.7 percent. Rest of the statistic, family association and team activities, which exhibit 23.9 and 15.8 percent. This phenomenon serves to remind us the fact that favors of doing physical exercises alone and doing with friends together are under the dominated situation in residents" preferences. Here are my private perspectives.

First and foremost, the Reform and Opening up policy plays a significant role in fundamental construction. With the economic development, our society has access to adjust more fund in stadiums building which enables residents to use the places alone or have fun with friends. Furthermore, under the broadcast of social media, more and more people realize the importance of keeping a sport habit. At the same time, people achieve friendships online and they can make an appointment of doing sports in association. In the end, sports are professional which require the members of participation to have the basic capacity of self-protection.

To put all into nutshell, more and more residents can harvest the entertainment of enjoying sports. With the development of our society, the ratio of doing physical exercises alone or doing with friends will rise to a upper class.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：Most of them prefer to

批改：Most of them prefer to do sports alone which account for...：定语从句的先行词是most of them（人），而account for（占...比例）的主语应是“比例”本身，造成逻辑错误。应改为 ...prefer to do sports alone, accounting for... 或用独立句 This option accounts for...

原文：ccompanying with

批改：Accompanying with friends and having activities which occupy...：这是一个不完整的句子，没有谓语动词。应改为 Exercising with friends accounts for 47.7%.

原文：Rest of the statistic, family a

批改：Rest of the statistic... which exhibit...：同样是句子不完整。Rest 前应加冠词 The rest，且 statistic 使用不当，应改为 The remaining categories, family activities and team activities, account for 23.9% and 15.8% respectively.

原文： remind us t

批改：remind us the fact：固定搭配错误，应为 remind us of the fact。

原文：private perspecti

批改：private perspectives：private（私人的）用在此处不贴切，改为 personal views 更地道。

原文：hat a vivid column chart it is ! It describes a far-reaching phenomenon. According to a city"s investigation of residents" preferences on doing physical exercises. Most of them prefer to do sports alone which account for 54.3 percent. Accompanying with friends and having activities which occupy the 47.7 percent. Rest of the statistic, family association and team activities, which exhibit 23.9 and 15.8 percent. This phenomenon serves to remind us the fact that favors of doing physical exercises alone and doing with friends together are under the dominated situation in residents" preferences. Here are my private perspectives

批改：你准确地抓住了图表中的核心数据，并指出了最主要的趋势，内容要点是具备的。但本段在句子结构的完整性和语法准确性上存在较多问题，多个句子因结构错误而无法独立成句

原文： has access to

批改：has access to adjust more fund：搭配错误且不地道。access to后接名词，adjust fund不搭配。应改为 can allocate more funds to building stadiums。

原文： under the broadcast of so

批改：under the broadcast of social media：介词使用不当，应为 With the promotion/broadcasting of social media。

原文：make an appointment of

批改：make an appointment of doing sports：搭配不当，应为 make an appointment to do sports。

原文：sports are professional which require the

批改：sports are professional which require...：此句与上下文的逻辑关联性不强，显得突兀。前文在讲设施和社交，突然转到“运动的专业性”和“自我保护”，论证上有些脱节。

原文：irst and foremost, the Reform and Opening up policy plays a significant role in fundamental construction. With the economic development, our society has access to adjust more fund in stadiums building which enables residents to use the places alone or have fun with friends. Furthermore, under the broadcast of social media, more and more people realize the importance of keeping a sport habit. At the same time, people achieve friendships online and they can make an appointment of doing sports in association. In the end, sports are professional which require the members of participation to have the basic capacity of self-protection.

批改：你从“经济建设提供设施”和“社交媒体提升意识”两个宏观角度进行分析，思路是开阔的。但第一个原因的论述链条可以更直接（从政策到锻炼偏好），第二个原因中的“在线交友”与“团体活动占比最低”的图表信息存在潜在矛盾。本段的论证与图表现象的契合度可以进一步加强。

原文：put all into nutshel

批改：To put all into nutshell：固定搭配错误，应为 To put it all in a nutshell

原文： harvest the entertai

批改：harvest the entertainment：动宾搭配稍显生硬，harvest多指收获具体成果，可改为 gain enjoyment from。

原文：to a upper cla

批改：a upper class：冠词错误，upper以元音发音开头，应用 an upper level。

原文：put all into nutshell, more and more residents can harvest the entertainment of enjoying sports. With the development of our society, the ratio of doing physical exercises alone or doing with friends will rise to a upper class.

批改：结尾段进行了总结和预测，方向正确。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10分

你的作文展现了不错的视野和词汇量，但当前阻碍你获得更高分数的主要障碍是 “句子不完整” 和 “论证与图表信息的贴合度有的低”。

给你的核心提升建议：

首要任务：写出完整正确的句子。请集中练习英语的五大基本句型，确保写出的每个句子都有主谓宾等核心成分，避免出现结构不完整的句子。这是当前最需要巩固的环节。

让论证紧扣图表：提出的每一个原因，都要问自己：“这能直接解释为什么‘独自’和‘与朋友’锻炼最受欢迎，而‘团体’和‘家人’相对冷清吗？” 这能使你的分析更具针对性。

精准使用固定搭配：有意识地记忆和运用 remind sb. of sth., in a nutshell, make an appointment to do 等地道搭配。

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