考研英语作文失分点多、提分空间大,一直是2021年考研英语二备考生核心痛点之一。本文围绕考研英语二作文真题话题,给出一篇经过启航教育老师精细批改的高分范文,文中不仅有逐句批注,还附有可复制的考研英语二高分写作模板。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart cleanly displays the percentage breakdown of the different ways to exercise in a certain city. Exercise alone takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercise with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercise with family and with team are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8% respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, exercising alone has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound exercise system, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for exercise.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures account and truthfully reflect the choices of citizens, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and they will likely remain relatively stable in the following decade.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:Exercise
批改:改成exercising动名词做主语
原文:exercise
批改:exercising
原文:exercise
批改:exercising
原文:The bar chart cleanly displays the percentage breakdown of the different ways to exercise in a certain city. Exercise alone takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercise with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercise with family and with team are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8% respectively.
批改:能够清晰的描绘图表中展现的内容,内容完整,注意避免小的语言错误。
原文:university students
批改:作文的主体不是大学生,而是某市居民,改成citizens
原文:e core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the saying goes, "On life"s stage, pressure is always present." Nowadays, university students are compelled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, exercising alone has emerged as their significant choice for utilizing leisure time. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound exercise system, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for exercise.
批改:能够对图表内容进行论述分析,语言较为连贯。
原文:account
批改:accurately
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures account and truthfully reflect the choices of citizens, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and they will likely remain relatively stable in the following decade.
批改:分析并预测了未来的趋势,言简意赅。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:10/15
1)内容符合题目的要求,能够准确全面的描绘出图表中的内容。
2)词汇方面,基础词汇一定要避免拼写错误,避免把accurately写成account;句式方面,能够运用一些复杂句式,句型结构灵活多变;语法方面,注意动名词才能做主语。
3)逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,符合英语句子结构的要求。
4)修改建议:可以看出作文完成的非常认真,内容充分,语言逻辑清晰,值得表扬。一定要细心一些,注意避免以上小的细节问题。再接再厉。
如果你也想让自己的考研英语二作文拿到理想分数,可以将本文的范文与老师批注作为标杆反复研读。同时,启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班已正式启动报名,在线咨询可获考研英语二作文真题高分资料礼包。
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