本文将启航教育一对一批改过的2021年考研英语二高分范文进行公开呈现。批改老师对文中每一个失分细节进行了精确标注,对照考研英语写作模板热点话题与评分细则,你可以快速了解考研英语写作的提分方向。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly depicts the percentage breakdown of exercise ways of the populace in ABC city. Exercise lonely take the lead at 54.3%, followed by do with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercise with family or teams are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follow. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build more Sport Center, enabling populace to have more expertise location to exercise, but the older people prefer sporting at the another site, such as park or street. In addition, exercise lonely or with friends can have a more free time , we can chose suitable time to go to sport according to daily things, it is very convenient. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of younger, serving as microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:Exercise lonely take
批改:Exercising alone takes
原文:do
批改:by是介词,改成exercising
原文:The bar chart clearly depicts the percentage breakdown of exercise ways of the populace in ABC city. Exercise lonely take the lead at 54.3%, followed by do with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercise with family or teams are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.
批改:清晰简要地描述了图表信息,言简意赅。
原文:follow
批改:复数follows
原文:Center
批改:复数
原文:exercise lonely
批改:exercising alone
原文:we
批改:前加and,连接两个并列分句
原文:chose
批改:choose
原文:it
批改:改成which引导非限定从
原文:The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follow. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build more Sport Center, enabling populace to have more expertise location to exercise, but the older people prefer sporting at the another site, such as park or street. In addition, exercise lonely or with friends can have a more free time , we can chose suitable time to go to sport according to daily things, it is very convenient. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:能够运用逻辑关系词对图表中的现象进行分析论述,注意避免小的语言错误。
原文:younger
批改:younger people
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of younger, serving as microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:分析并预测了未来的趋势,言简意赅。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:9/15
1)内容符合题目的要求,能够准确全面的描绘出图表中的内容。
2)词汇方面,基础词汇一定要避免拼写错误,名词单复数要使用正确,还要正确区分词性;句式方面,能够运用一些复杂句式,句型结构灵活多变,但是要注意句子结构的完整;语法方面,介词后加动词ing形式。
3)逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,符合英语句子结构的要求。
4)修改建议:可以看出作文完成的比较认真,内容充分,语言逻辑清晰,值得表扬。一定要细心一些,注意避免以上小的细节问题。再接再厉。
读懂范文只是第一步,写出高分作文才是关键。启航教育提供考研英语作文免费批改服务,由资深讲师逐句点评,让你清晰掌握考研英语写作模板写作锦囊的核心要点。2027考研英语备考,从一篇专业批改开始。
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