作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2017年考研英语一大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语一真题常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、考研英语一2017年大作文题目
考研英语一2017年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following pictures. In your essay, you should1) describe the pictures briefly, 2) interpret the meaning, and 3) give your comments. You should write neatly on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2017年大作文批改例文
In the left-hand cartoon, there is a boy, lying in the sofa and saying that "How much books I have." On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, another boy says to himself "I will finish 20 books this year." Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that making practice is the brush that paints a bright future, while only thinking is the shackle that hinders progress.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, in modern society full of changes, dhances, and challenges, making practice has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordimary people, and its significance has become increasingly evident. On the other hand, only thinking is like a heavy chain that hinders children"s progress, depriving them of the ability to think independently and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.
In brief, making practice is the catalyst for societal and persmal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice; additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detimental effects of only thinking to ensure our growth stays on course.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:much
批改:many修饰可数名词
原文:In the left-hand cartoon, there is a boy, lying in the sofa and saying that "How much books I have." On the contrary, in the right-hand portrayal, another boy says to himself "I will finish 20 books this year." Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that making practice is the brush that paints a bright future, while only thinking is the shackle that hinders progress.
批改:能够完整全面的描述出图画中的现象,并能够直接点明作文的主题。
原文:ordimary
批改:ordinary
原文:This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, in modern society full of changes, dhances, and challenges, making practice has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordimary people, and its significance has become increasingly evident. On the other hand, only thinking is like a heavy chain that hinders children"s progress, depriving them of the ability to think independently and preventing them from shining brightly in future society.
批改:该段落能够将图画背后蕴含的真实意义加以阐述,语言衔接连贯。能够运用逻辑关系词来连接句子,值得表扬。
原文:persmal
批改:personal
原文:detimental
批改:detrimental
原文:In brief, making practice is the catalyst for societal and persmal development, from which we all stand to benefit. Therefore, we should actively support and advocate this practice; additionally, we must be acutely aware of the detimental effects of only thinking to ensure our growth stays on course.
批改:该段能够针对图画现象提出自己的解决措施,注意避免拼写错误。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:17/20
内容切题,全面的描绘出了图画中的内容。词汇方面,注意避免拼写错误,以及注意many修饰可数名词,much修饰不可数名词;句式方面,句子结构完整连贯;语法方面,语法基础还不错。逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,结构清晰。
修改建议:可以看出作文完成的非常认真,无论是内容的充分性还是语言的逻辑结构都特别的清晰,值得表扬。如果能够再注意避免以上的一些小的细节问题会更好。继续加油。
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