2021年考研英语二大作文怎么写？附例文批改

考研英语写作模板命题趋势越来越关注社会热点与考生思辨能力。本文带来的2021年考研英语二批改范例，透过图表/图画深挖现象背后的本质，由启航教育老师逐段精批，可帮助考生建立稳定的考研英语写作思维框架。

一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The bar chart which is given above compares the quantity variation of the different ways of physical exercise for residents in a certain city, manifesting that the manners of physical exercise are various and infinite. Exercise by oneself takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family and exercising with group are also considered, accounting for 23.9% and 15.8%, respectively.

From my perspective, the core reasons for the above - mentioned phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To begin with,freely and optimistically, the younger generation are used to living alone for exercising. Therefore, the proportion of those who choose to exercise alone is taking the major share.In addition, considering that we are in a society pursuing high - quality development, our government has introduced relevant policies for our spiritual life, which are aimed at enhancing our physical exercise. Owing to these factors, the data presented in the bar chart is easy to understand.

I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of residents,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：which is given above compares the quantity variation of the

批改：开篇略显冗长。which is given above 可简化为 above；quantity variation (数量变化) 用词不准确，图表显示的是不同方式的“占比 (proportion/percentage)”，而非数量的“变化”

原文： the manners of physical exercise are various and infinite. Exercise by oneself takes the lead at 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Additionally, factors such as exercising with family and exercising with group

批改：①（无限的）不符合图表实际，图表仅列出四类方式，应改为 “manifesting that residents have diverse choices of physical exercise methods”；②词汇优化，“exercising with group” 表达不规范，“group” 为可数名词，应改为 “group exercise”（考研常用表达 “团体运动”）；③“factors such as exercising with family” 用词不当，“exercising with family” 是运动方式而非 “因素”，应改为 “other methods including exercising with family”

批改：本段基本完成了数据描述的任务，结构清晰，涵盖了所有四种锻炼方式及其数据。主要问题在于开篇句用词不准确和后续部分出现了关键的概念混淆 (quantity variation, factors)，以及个别用词不当 (infinite)，这影响了描述的专业性和精确度。

原文：reely and optimistically, the younger generation are used to living alone for exercising. Therefore, the proportion of those who choose to exercise alone is taking the major share.In addition, considering that we are in a society pursuing high - quality development, our government has introduced relevant policies for our spiritual life, which are aimed at enhancing our physical exercis

批改：① 语序错误，“freely and optimistically, the younger generation are used to living alone for exercising” 中副词位置不当，且语义逻辑突兀，可改为 “Many young people prefer exercising alone for its flexibility”（“灵活性” 更能解释独自运动的优势，逻辑更通顺）；② 逻辑牵强，“our government has introduced relevant policies for our spiritual life, which are aimed at enhancing our physical exercise” 中 “政府政策” 与 “运动方式选择” 的逻辑关联薄弱，且 “spiritual life”（精神生活）与 “physical exercise”（体育锻炼）搭配不当，可改为 “another reason is the fast pace of modern life—people find it difficult to coordinate schedules with others, making solo exercise a more convenient choice”（补充更贴合实际的 “时间协调难” 作为原因）

批改：该段尝试围绕图表趋势展开原因分析，回应了题目 “给出评论” 的要求，但存在细节上存在优化空间，而且第二个论点的相关性有待加强

原文：am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of residents,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

批改：无功无过，相对泛化，可以和前文的联系加强一点，加强相关性。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：11/15 分

本文整体符合考研英语二大作文的基本要求，完整覆盖 “解读图表” 和 “给出评论” 两大核心任务，采用 “图表描述 - 原因分析 - 总结评论” 的经典三段式结构，逻辑框架清晰。在图表描述部分，准确呈现了各类运动方式的占比，数据清晰；在评论部分，尝试分析原因并进行趋势预测，内容有一定完整性。但文章存在需优化的问题：一是语言表达层面，存在冗余、空泛的问题，词汇搭配和句式表达的准确性、地道性不足；二是论证逻辑层面，原因分析与图表趋势关联性弱，缺乏说服力，未能结合实际生活场景补充合理支撑。总体而言，文章的结构和核心内容达标，但语言规范性、论证逻辑性和评论深度是主要扣分点。如果针对性的改进，作文的分数会进一步提升1-2分。

参考范文

The bar chart compares the popularity of four physical exercise methods among residents in a certain city. As can be seen from the data, exercising alone ranks first with 54.3%, followed by exercising with friends at 47.7%. Exercising with family accounts for 23.9%, while group exercise has the lowest proportion at 15.8%.

Several factors contribute to this trend. Firstly, the fast pace of modern life makes it difficult for people to coordinate schedules with others, so solo exercise has become a convenient choice due to its flexibility. Secondly, many young people prefer the freedom and independence that solo exercise offers, allowing them to arrange their exercise time and intensity freely. In contrast, group exercise or exercising with others requires more communication and coordination, which may not suit everyone’s lifestyle.

In my opinion, the trend reflects the changing lifestyle of modern residents. While solo exercise is practical, group exercise also has unique advantages, such as promoting social interaction and enhancing motivation. Therefore, residents can balance the two methods according to their needs. It is expected that the proportion of different exercise methods will remain relatively stable, as they all cater to different personal preferences and life scenarios.

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