思想品质、教育文化是考研英语大作文的高频命题方向,本文呈现的2011年考研英语二批改范例正是聚焦这一主旨。启航教育老师透过文章结构、衔接表达和结尾升华三方面,逐段展示了一篇考研英语作文真题范文高分范文的诞生过程。
一、2011年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)
二、2011年考研英语二大作文批改例文
B节
48 The bar chart clearly depicts the Aport brand market share in domestic car market from 2008 to 2009. In 2008, the percentage of domestic brand was approximately 26%, but by 2009, this rate has gradually increased to 30%. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brand experienced a significant decline of 15% during the same period. Simultaneously, the percentage of American brand remained stable and steady
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, against the backdrop of our country"s rapid and dynamic development, the young generation, particular those born in 1990s and 2000s, are accustomed to using domestic cars, and have become the primary consumer group. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevating the purchasing power of the popllace, enabling the price of foreign cars become lower than before. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
what about future trends? I"m confident that the percentage of domestic brands will steadily increase in the following decade. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese and American brands will likely continue to decrease. 2页
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:Aport
批改:不知道这里是什么意思
原文:brand
批改:brands 不止一个品牌
原文:brand
批改:brands 不止一个品牌
原文:brand
批改:brands 不止一个品牌
原文:has
批改:had,过去完成时
原文:The bar chart clearly depicts the Aport brand market share in domestic car market from 2008 to 2009. In 2008, the percentage of domestic brand was approximately 26%, but by 2009, this rate has gradually increased to 30%. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese brand experienced a significant decline of 15% during the same period. Simultaneously, the percentage of American brand remained stable and steady
批改:信息清晰,注意语法错误
原文:particular
批改:particularly
原文:popllace
批改:populace
原文:1990s
批改:加the,特指年代
原文:The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, against the backdrop of our country"s rapid and dynamic development, the young generation, particular those born in 1990s and 2000s, are accustomed to using domestic cars, and have become the primary consumer group. In addition, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevating the purchasing power of the popllace, enabling the price of foreign cars become lower than before. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:词汇句型丰富
原文:what
批改:首字母大写
原文:decade
批改:这里稍有争议,如果未来十年用单数,如果指未来数十年用decades
原文:what about future trends? I"m confident that the percentage of domestic brands will steadily increase in the following decade. In contrast, the proportion of Japanese and American brands will likely continue to decrease. 2页
批改:good
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:10/15
1.作文内容包含全面,主题明确,层次分明;
2.运用复杂的语法结构和高级词汇,定语从句,非谓语动词和宾语从句很棒;
3.采用恰当的衔接手法,内容较为连贯;
4.要多内化老师讲的高分词汇和模板句型,形成自己的语料库和写作思路,加油!
启航教育考研英语批改服务累计已帮助众多考生实现写作提分。本文精解的2011年考研英语二范文,正是来自启航教育写作批改的真实案例。想要获得同样专业的批改,扫描页面二维码或在线咨询即可预约考研英语作文真题范文免费批改名额。
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