历年考研英语大作文命题往往聚焦社会、经济、文化与教育等核心话题。本文精解的2021年考研英语二真题,正是考研英语作文真题范文常考方向中的代表题。透过启航老师逐段批注,可帮助考生建立稳定的写作思路。
一、2021年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2021年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and 2)give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2021年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly depicts different choices about graduated students in 2013 and2018 at certain senior school.In2013,the percentage of employment was 68.1%,but by 2018,the figure had substantially decrease to 60.7%.Meanwhile,the proportion of continuing study experienced a significant increase of 7.7% during the same period.Simultaneouslyw,the percentage of starting a company remained stable and steady.
The core reasons for observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conduct of orchestrating the symphony of changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound education system,enabling university students to have ample opportunities for further education.In addition,an increasing number of young people believed that in modern society full of changes,challenges,and chances,continuing to study is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run.
What about future trends? I am confident that the proportion of continuing to study is a clear sign of.social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.In contrast,the proportion of employment will likely continue to decrease.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:about future trends? I am confident that the proportion of continuing to study is a clear sign of.social improvement and will steadily increase in the following decades.In contrast,the proportion of employment will likely continue to decrease.
批改:展望段落的结论合理,且基于前文分析自然推导而出
原文: core reasons for observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conduct of orchestrating the symphony of changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound education system,enabling university students to have ample opportunities for further education.In addition,an increasing number of young people believed that in modern society full of changes,challenges,and chances,continuing to study is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run.
批改:本段的论证角度非常好!从“政府政策支持”和“个人观念转变”两个层面分析原因,全面且符合逻辑。 orchestrating the symphony of changes 这个比喻极具文采,是文章的亮点。 第二个论点将深造与现代社会特质(变化、挑战、机遇)联系起来,论证很有说服力。 论证框架扎实,内容深刻,显示了你的思辨能力
原文:or observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conduct of orchestrating t
批改:for observed phenomenon 前缺少冠词,应为 for the observed phenomenon。 as the conduct of orchestrating... 中,conduct (行为) 用词不当。你想使用的可能是 conductor (指挥家)。这个比喻本身非常精彩,可以改为 as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes。
原文:ar chart clearly depicts different choices about graduated students in 2013 and2018 at certain senior school.In2013,the percentage of employment was 68.1%,but by 2018,the figure had substantially decrease to 60.7%.Meanwhile,the proportion of continuing study experienced a significant increase of 7.7% during the same period.Simultaneouslyw,the percentage of starting a company remained stable and steady.
批改:你成功描述了数据的主要变化,并注意到了不同趋势的对比
原文:senior school.In2013,the percentage of employment was 68.1%,but by 2018,the figure had substantially decrease to 60.7%.Meanwhile,the proportion of continuing study experienced a significant
批改:senior school 通常指高中,这里描述的大学生毕业生,使用 a certain university 更准确。 had substantially decrease 语法错误,过去完成时应使用过去分词,改为 had substantially decreased。 experienced a significant increase of 7.7% 此表述可能产生歧义,是指“增长了7.7%”还是“增长率达7.7%”?从图表逻辑看,应明确是百分点(percentage points)的提升或直接写明从X%上升到Y%。 Simultaneouslyw 拼写错误,应为 Simultaneously。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:15
主要优点:
结构完整清晰:严格遵循了“图表描述-原因分析-趋势预测”的经典结构。
论证深刻有力:原因分析从宏观政策到微观个人选择,视角全面,逻辑自洽。
语言有闪光点:能够创造出 orchestrating the symphony of changes 这样精彩的比喻,并熟练使用 indispensable, substantially 等高级词汇。
核心提升点:
当前的主要提升空间在于:
数据描述的精确性:确保数据解读无歧义,是图表作文专业性的关键。
语言细节的规范:注意拼写、冠词、时态和动词形态等细节,确保全文语言严谨。
很多考研英语考生都遇到过写作时思路枯竭、句式单一的问题,本文精解的2021年考研英语二范文正是突破这一瓶颈的优质范本。启航教育写作主讲会针对考研英语二常考话题逐一拆解,让考研英语作文真题范文写作变得有迹可循。
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