2021年考研英语一大作文属于典型的图表作文,要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇柱状图批改范例,完整覆盖考研英语一写作冲刺常考图表的描述思路,是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。
一、2021年考研英语一大作文题目
考研英语一2021年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the picture below. In your essay, you should1)describe the picture briefly, 2)interpret the implied meaning, and 3)give your comments. Write your answer on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、2021年考研英语一大作文批改例文
As shown in the picture, there are a children, says to your dad, "dad, many classmates all think traditional opera is not interesting", his dad says to he," you like it is enough". Evidesly, the picture inteads to conveg to readers that traditional culture be losed is an issue that requires great attation both in our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-prouoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese tradition may be outdated, the virtue of traditional culture is one that should never lose iss luster, as it is an esential bond that keeps the Chinese nation thriving. On the other hand, in modern society full of changes, challenges and chanles, perseverance has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people. and its signficant has become increasingly evident.
How can we put an end to the problem of traditional culture losing? It is suggested be many that we need a package deal, include instill the idea of Chinese traditional culture into student. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to help students cultivate more national valoues. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issure at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文: shown in the picture, there are a children, says to your dad, "dad, many classmates all think traditional opera is not interesting", his dad says to he," you like it is enough". Evidesly, the picture inteads to conveg to readers that traditional culture be losed is an issue that requires great attation both in our personal lives and in society.
批改: 你准确地抓住了图画中的核心对话,并引出了传统文化传承的主题。
原文:, there are a childr
批改:“there are a children” 存在主谓不一致,应改为 “there is a child”
原文:says to he," you like it is enough". Evidesly, the picture inteads to conveg to readers that traditional c
批改:“says to your dad” 中的 “your” 指代不清,应改为 “his dad”。“says to he” 是语法错误,宾语应用宾格 “him”。“you like it is enough” 是中式英语,可改为 “It‘s enough that you like it”。
原文:". Evidesly, the picture inteads to conveg to readers that traditional culture be losed is an issue that requires great attation both in our personal lives and in socie
批改:词汇与拼写:“Evidesly” 应为 “Evidently”。“inteads” 应为 “intends”。“conveg” 应为 “convey”。“losed” 作为“流失”意思时,应用 “being lost” 或 “dying out”。“attation” 应为 “attention”。
原文:his phenomenon is thought-prouoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese tradition may be outdated, the virtue of traditional culture is one that should never lose iss luster, as it is an esential bond that keeps the Chinese nation thriving. On the other hand, in modern society full of changes, challenges and chanles, perseverance has become a key factor that distinguishes exceptional individuals from ordinary people. and its signficant has become increasingly evident.
批改:你从传统文化的价值和个人坚持的重要性两个角度论证,思路是开阔的。
原文:thought-prouoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese tradition may be outdated, the virtue of traditional culture is one that should never lose iss luster, as it is an esential bond that keeps the Chinese nation thriving. On the other hand, in modern society full of changes, challenges and chanles, perseverance
批改:词汇与拼写:“thought-prouoking” 应为 “thought-provoking”。“iss” 应为 “its”。“luster” 意为光泽。“esential” 应为 “essential”。“chanles” 应为 “chances”。“signficant” 应为 “significance”。
原文:ow can we put an end to the problem of traditional culture losing? It is suggested be many that we need a package deal, include instill the idea of Chinese traditional culture into student. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to help students cultivate more national valoues. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issure at its core.
批改:以提问方式开头引出解决方案,形式很好。提出的措施也具有现实意义
原文:It is suggested be many that we need a package deal, include instill the idea of Chinese traditional cultu
批改:“It is suggested be many” 应改为 “It is suggested by many”。“include instill” 中,介词 “include” 后应接动名词 “including” 或直接跟名词 “the instilment of”。“student” 应用复数 “students”。“tackle the issure” 中,“issue” 拼写错误
原文:l valoues. W
批改:“valoues” 应为 “values”。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:15分
总评:
你的文章展现了清晰的写作意识和关心社会问题的责任感,这是非常宝贵的。
修改建议
紧扣画面寓意:确保每一段的论证都从图画本身出发,避免引入与画面逻辑关联不直接的观点(如“毅力”),这样文章的整体感会更强。
打好语言地基:目前拼写和语法错误对文章理解造成了较大影响。建议从夯实核心词汇和基本句型入手,动笔前先想清楚句子的主干,写完后逐词检查拼写。
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