对于考研英语一而言,2024年大作文常以图画形式呈现。本文精解的这篇图画批改范例,启航教育老师逐句解读图画细节、寓意提炼与评论展开三步走,是考研英语作文话题图画作文的经典教学样本。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
In the left-hand cartoon, there is a boy, standing in a park and saying, “ This new park is very good!” Simultaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the number of parks experienced a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many parks, enabling people to exercise freely. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue physical health. This explains why an increasing number of them choose to exercise in the park. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
what about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:he left-hand cartoon, there is a boy, standing in a park and saying, “ This new park is very good!” Simultaneously, in the right-hand bar chart, the number of parks experienced a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.
批改:开篇段完成得非常出色!你准确地描述了漫画和图表的核心信息,并且这次直接点出了增长的具体数值“264”,这是一个非常好的细节,让描述更具说服力。句子结构也很清晰。
原文: core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build many parks, enabling people to exercise freely. In addition, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people are no longer content with mere material satisfaction; they also pursue physical health. This explains why an increasing number of them choose to exercise in the park. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:论证段是你这篇作文的亮点!首先,我特别高兴地看到你保留了“conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes”这个生动又高级的比喻,说明你已经能熟练运用好的表达了。更重要的是,你新增了“社会高速发展”和“人们不再满足于物质”这一层原因,这让你的论证更加深入和全面,体现了非常好的思辨能力。逻辑衔接词“To start with”和“In addition”也用得恰到好处。
原文:at about future trends? I am confident that the number of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.
批改:结尾段通过设问开启,方式很好。你的观点明确,直接给出了对未来趋势的判断
原文:what ab
批改:首字母“w”建议大写,即 What about...
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:16
评分理由:
内容要点: 你全面地覆盖了所有内容要点,并且论证有深度。
语法与词汇: 你主动并成功地使用了不少复杂的语法结构和高级词汇,这是你作文的闪光点。
语言准确性: 全文几乎没有影响理解的语法问题,只有几处非常细微的格式和拼写可以调整。
连贯与衔接: 段落内部和段落之间的逻辑层次非常清晰,衔接自然。
你的作文在逻辑深度和语言质量上都很好。那个“交响乐指挥”的比喻用得恰到好处,是你作文的加分项。
考研英语作文话题写作提分高效的方式,是让经验丰富的老师亲自批改你的作文。启航教育2027考研英语斌哥写作锦囊冲刺抢分班,主讲斌哥亲批每一份学员作业,真题作业批改、轻松应对各种复杂题目,让考研英语写作更有底。
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