作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2019年考研英语二大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语二作文模板常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、2019年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2019年大作文48. Directions: Write an essay based on the chart below. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2019年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The line chart clearly depicts the career development of students after graduation.In 2013,the percentage of finding work was 68.1, but by 2018, this rate had gradually declined to 60.7.Meanwhile,the proportion of entering a higher level of education experienced an increase of 7.7. Simultaneously,the percentage of starting a business remained stable and steady.
The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound education system,enabling university students to ample opportunities for further education.In addition,an increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of challenges,changes and chances ,brevity is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run .So there a number of students decided to launch their own business.Considering these factors, depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the percentage of getting a higher education will steadily increase in the following decades.In contrast,the proportion of finding work will likely continue to decrease.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:68.1
批改:补充%
原文:60.7
批改:补充%
原文:7.7
批改:补充%
原文:The line chart clearly depicts the career development of students after graduation.In 2013,the percentage of finding work was 68.1, but by 2018, this rate had gradually declined to 60.7.Meanwhile,the proportion of entering a higher level of education experienced an increase of 7.7. Simultaneously,the percentage of starting a business remained stable and steady.
批改:用具体数据描述图表内容,清晰直观,但是建议在段落后面补充这些数据反映的社会现象
原文: to
批改:to have
原文: there
批改:删除
原文:The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound education system,enabling university students to ample opportunities for further education.In addition,an increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of challenges,changes and chances ,brevity is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run .So there a number of students decided to launch their own business.Considering these factors, depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:以分论点的形式论述这一现象背后的原因,逻辑严谨,层次分明。
原文:depicted
批改:补充定冠词the
原文:What about future trends? I am confident that the percentage of getting a higher education will steadily increase in the following decades.In contrast,the proportion of finding work will likely continue to decrease.
批改:总结全文,升华主题,展望未来,立意深远。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:13/15
这篇文章内容完整充实,结构清晰合理,逻辑严谨,层次分明,句型表达丰富。
语法:需要注意一些基础的语法问题和表达搭配问题,有时间好好看看文中的批改,细心吸收,争取在接下来的练习中避免类似的错误。
首段总体概括图表主题,详细列出关键数据变化,突出就业比例下降、升学比例上升的趋势;第二段分析原因,可从政府鼓励深造、社会就业压力增大、学生追求自我实现等方面进行论述;第三段评论与展望,预测未来趋势可能持续,并强调其对个人和社会发展的积极意义。
文章整体来说,言简意赅,符合了考试写作提纲的要求,文章表示语义衔接的词语运用不太多,在以后的写作中可以多尝试使用一些表示衔接的词语,这样文章段落内部句内和段落之间的关系就能很明朗的表现出来。同时注意避免单纯罗列数据,可适当引用社会现象或政策背景支持分析,增强说服力。
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