2013年考研英语二大作文实例分析与批改

想在考研英语二大作文中写出有深度的论证段落？本文精解的2013年考研英语二真题范文，从论据选择、过渡句使用到结尾点题都极具参考价值。启航教育考研英语教研组对该篇范文的批注，有助于考生建立完善的写作逻辑。

一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文

以下是纯文本格式的内容：

The bar chart clearly depicts the part-time jobs of students at a creatin unversity.

In the freshman year, the percentage of having part-time job was 67.71%, but by their junior year, this rate had gradually risen to 71.93%. In contrast, the proportion of having part-time job expericened a significant increase of 16.31% from the junior year to the senior year.

The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, An increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of changes, challenges and chances, making money is indispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run. In addition, Nowadays, university students are compe-lled to confront immense academic pressure, and as a result, getting a part-time job has let them get some interest. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurpring.

What abaut future trends? I am confident that the prepro proportion of the part-time jobs of student will steadily increase.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：the part-time jobs

批改：此处重点描述的是变化，改为 the changes in part-time job situations 更精确

原文：of students

批改：改为 among college students

原文：of

批改：此处指的是有兼职工作的学生的数量，改为 of students

原文：job

批改：改为 jobs, 可数名词单数形式不能单独存在

原文：of

批改：改为 of students

原文： job

批改：改为 jobs

批改：此处写为第一段，表达不错，清晰地阐述了图表内容

批改：此处和下一段共同写为第一段

原文： reason

批改：下列有几个原因，此处为复数，改为 reasons

原文：An

批改：此次首字母不大写

批改：语法正确

原文：Nowadays

批改：此次首字母不大写

原文： unsurpring

批改：unsurprising

原文： has let

批改：此处表达很生硬，改为 enables

原文：get some interest

批改：enable sb to do sth, 此处改为 to find some fun 找到一些乐趣

批改：内容表达不错，也比较具体

原文：prepro

批改：删去

原文： the part-time jobs of student

批改：改为 of students taking part-time jobs

批改：结尾预测也很合理

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10分/ 15分

题目要求：总体上来说是切题的，表明的个人观点与图表的内容是贴合的

语言表达：存在几处语法和拼写问题，词汇表达不错，一些句式表达也很好

结构逻辑：内容也比较丰富具体，结构上建议写为三段式

修改建议：1. 语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改 2.拼写要细心 3. 首字母大小写要规范 4. 结构上写为三段式，之后可以多积累素材，自己多练练句子，进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备，提高自己的语言表达，试着多用自己的话来写，总的来说写的不错，加油！

无论你是2026年考生还是备战2027考研英语，精读本文的2013年考研英语二批改范例都能为你的写作带来提升。启航教育的写作主讲与AI智能批改系统全天候待命，为你的考研英语二写作冲刺冲刺保驾护航。