距离2027考研英语初试已不足一年,写作冲刺阶段高效的复习方式就是精研历年真题高分范文。本文精解的2015年考研英语二批改范例,紧扣考研英语二真题写作锦囊要点,全文结构严谨、表达地道,适合所有2027考生。
一、2015年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2015年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2015年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of cost of citizen of a certain city during the Spring Festival. New year’s gifts takes the lead at 40%. Additionally,factors such as traffic, party, and the other are also considered, accounting for 20%,20%, and 20%, respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. In the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes ways of consumption have undergone significant changes. This explains why an increasing number of people choose new year’s gifts rather than traditional options. What’s more, people are no longer content with mere material satisfaction, they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of citizen, serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文: cost of citizen of a
批改:cost(成本)不如 spending(开支)或 expenditure 准确。 citizen 为可数名词,此处应用复数 citizens,更好的表达是 residents" spending(居民的开支)。
原文:ew year’s gifts ta
批改:主谓不一致:主语 gifts 是复数,谓语动词 takes 应改为 take。 专有名词:New year’s 作为专有名词一部分,首字母应大写,即 New Year"s。
原文: as traffic, party, and the
批改:factors... are considered(因素被考虑)不准确,图表展示的是实际开支。 party(派对)过于宽泛,dining gatherings(聚餐)更精确。 the other(特指另一个)使用错误,应改为 other categories 或 others。
原文:pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of cost of citizen of a certain city during the Spring Festival. New year’s gifts takes the lead at 40%. Additionally,factors such as traffic, party, and the other are also considered, accounting for 20%,20%, and 20%, respectively.
批改:本段成功概括了图表的核心信息。主要问题在于用词的专业性、名词单复数、主谓一致和固定搭配。图表描述需要最精确和客观的语言。
原文:ple"s attitude
批改:语法错误:attitudes 和 ways 是两个名词直接并列,结构错误。应改为 attitudes toward consumption(消费态度)或 consumption habits(消费习惯)。
原文:his explains why an in
批改:逻辑跳跃:这个句子的逻辑链条是“消费观念改变 -> 选择新年礼物”。这个联系不够直接和紧密。“观念改变”是一个很宽泛的原因,它如何具体导致“礼物”开支增加?这里需要更具体的解释。 拼写:new year’s 应改为 New Year"s。
原文:What’s more, people are no
批改:串句错误:这是一个“串句”,用逗号连接了两个完整的句子。必须改为句号、分号或加连词。例如:...material satisfaction; they also... 或 ...material satisfaction, and they also...
原文:e core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. In the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes ways of consumption have undergone significant changes. This explains why an increasing number of people choose new year’s gifts rather than traditional options. What’s more, people are no longer content with mere material satisfaction, they also pursue spiritual enjoyment. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:本段提出了两个合理的论点方向(观念变化、精神享受)。但第一个论点的论证链条比较薄弱,没有建立强因果关系;同时出现了句子结构错误。你需要让解释更具体,并确保语法正确。
原文: citizen,
批改:语法错误:citizen 应用复数 citizens。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:10分
总评:
同学,你的作文结构清晰,然而,这篇作文在论证的深度和句子的严谨性上还有提升空间。你的论点很好,但需要更充分地展开,让逻辑关系更紧密。
修改建议
让论证更具体:避免“观念改变”这类宽泛的原因。试着将其具体化,例如:“Changing attitudes emphasize emotional expression, making gift-giving a more valued way to show care during festivals than before.”
检查句子结构:写完后,请专门检查是否有“串句”(用逗号连接两个完整句子)。这是你目前最高频的语法错误之一。
透过这篇2015年考研英语二批改范文,相信你对考研英语二真题的写作框架有了更深入的认识。启航教育长期为考研英语考生提供一对一专业作文批改,从词汇、语法到结构系统诊断失分点,欢迎在线咨询预约免费批改名额。
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