作为考研英语备考的核心模块,2015年考研英语二大作文承载了大量学生的提分期待。本文带来的这篇批改例文,紧扣考研英语二作文范文常见话题,由启航教育资深英语教研团队逐句批改,详细标注语法、词汇与逻辑三大失分点,是考研英语写作提分的优质资料。
一、2015年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2015年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2015年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the expense in the New Year. The New Year gifts takes the lead at 40%, Additionally, factors such as traffic and dining together and others are also considered,evenly accounting for 20%, 20% and 20%.
The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards of food have undergone significant changes which currently trend to eat less and be healthy. This explains why an increasing number of people chose giving a gift rather than eating some unhealthy food. In addition, against the back drop of own country"s rapid and dynamic development, the younger generation, particularly those born in the lagos and 2000s, are accustomed to exchanges gifts and have become the primary consumer proup. This generation expecially is used to public truffic which help them saving money and protecting the environment. Considered these factors, the depited phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
what about the future! I am confident that the number of saving in gifts will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrart, the number proportion of traffic expense will likely continue to decrease relatively stable as the goverment improving the infrastructure.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:takes
批改:改成take,注意主谓一致
原文:The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of the expense in the New Year. The New Year gifts takes the lead at 40%, Additionally, factors such as traffic and dining together and others are also considered,evenly accounting for 20%, 20% and 20%.
批改:清晰简要地描述了图表信息,言简意赅。
原文:reason
批改:复数
原文:of
批改:of多余,去掉
批改:加上:make people
原文:own
批改:our
原文:lagos
批改:这应该是年代
原文:exchanges
批改:to是介词,改成exchanging
原文:proup
批改:group
原文:expecially
批改:especially
原文:truffic
批改:traffic
原文:help
批改:helps
原文:saving
批改:to save
原文:protecting
批改:protect
原文:Considered
批改:Considering
原文:depited
批改:depicted
原文:The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, in the wake of the high-speed advancement of society, people"s attitudes towards of food have undergone significant changes which currently trend to eat less and be healthy. This explains why an increasing number of people chose giving a gift rather than eating some unhealthy food. In addition, against the back drop of own country"s rapid and dynamic development, the younger generation, particularly those born in the lagos and 2000s, are accustomed to exchanges gifts and have become the primary consumer proup. This generation expecially is used to public truffic which help them saving money and protecting the environment. Considered these factors, the depited phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:能够运用逻辑关系词对图表中的现象进行分析论述,注意避免小的语言错误。
原文:what
批改:W大写
原文:future!
批改:future trend?
原文:saving
批改:cost费用
原文:contrart
批改:contrast
原文:number
批改:去掉
原文:goverment
批改:government
原文:improving
批改:改成谓语improves
原文:what about the future! I am confident that the number of saving in gifts will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrart, the number proportion of traffic expense will likely continue to decrease relatively stable as the goverment improving the infrastructure.
批改:分析并预测了未来的趋势,小的语言错误需要避免。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:8/15
1)内容符合题目的要求,能够准确全面的描绘出图表中的内容。
2)词汇方面,基础词汇一定要避免拼写错误,名词单复数要使用正确;句式方面,要注意句子成分的完整;语法方面,注意主谓一致以及定语从句的结构正确。
3)逻辑结构清晰完整,论证较为充分。能够运用一些逻辑关系词来连接句子,符合英语句子结构的要求。
4)修改建议:内容充分,语言逻辑清晰,值得表扬。但是一定要细心一些,注意避免以上小的细节问题。再接再厉。
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