当你坐在考研英语一考场,面对2024年大作文题目的那一瞬间,是否能快速组织起一篇结构清晰、表达地道的高分文章?本文这篇批改例文,正是考研英语一写作冲刺话题下的标准范本,适合每一位考研英语备考生反复研读。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
I
As shown in the picture, there are youngsters, running and walking in the city park. A young man says:"It is so fantastic new park which next to homes" In the right-hand bar chart depicts the number of parks in recent years. Evidently, the cartoonist intend to convey to reads thatitis sports that plays an important and positive role both in our personal live and in society. Because in 2020, the number of park was 406, but by 2022, this figure had substantially risen to 670.
bSports is catabst for societal and personal development. Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and perofound transformation, In my view, the funda-mental reason for this phenomenon is the development of the level of lifes. What"s more, as we all know, the out break of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, sign ificamly alterinc people"s behaviors and choices. Consegently, an increasing number of individuals have started playing more attention to heath.
In a short, sports make our world with brillrance 必德快用黑鱼字迹状写,在答提卡反域内作的 加出现角照定区域的案干
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:says:"It is so fantastic new park which next to homes" In the right-hand bar chart depicts the number of parks in recent years. Evidently, the cartoonist intend to convey to reads thatitis sports that plays an important and positive role both in our personal live and in society. Because in 2020, the number of park was 406, but by 2022, this figure had substantially risen to 670.
批改:第一段包含了所有必要的信息点,这很好
原文:"It is so fantastic new park which next to homes" In the right-hand bar chart depicts the number of parks in recent years. Evidently, the cartoonist intend to convey to reads thatitis sports that
批改:"It is so fantastic new park which next to homes" 这句话的语法可以优化。更地道的表达是 "It"s so fantastic to have a new park next to our homes!" 或 "The new park next to our homes is so fantastic!"。 In the right-hand bar chart depicts... 存在语法错误,应去掉 In,使 the bar chart 作主语。 the cartoonist intend 主谓不一致,应为 the cartoonist intends。 to reads 应为 to readers。 thatitis 应为 that it is。 in our personal live 应为 in our personal lives。
原文:bSports is catabst for societal and personal development. Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and perofound transformation, In my view, the funda-mental reason for this phenomenon is the development of the level of lifes. What"s more, as we all know, the out break of COVID-1
批改:bSports -> Sports (句首字母大写,并去掉多余的b) catabst -> a catalyst (根据上下文推断,此处应为笔误) perofound -> profound (拼写错误) funda-mental -> fundamental (拼写错误) lifes -> life (life 作为“生活”讲时是不可数名词) out break -> outbreak (拼写错误) sign ificamly -> significantly (拼写错误) alterinc -> altering (拼写错误) Consegently -> Consequently (拼写错误) playing more attention -> paying more attention (固定搭配) heath -> health (拼写错误)
原文:rts is catabst for societal and personal development. Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and perofound transformation, In my view, the funda-mental reason for this phenomenon is the development of the level of lifes. What"s more, as we all know, the out break of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, sign ificamly alterinc people"s behaviors and choices. Consegently, an increasing number of individuals have started playing more attention to heath.
批改:本段尝试分析两个原因,思路是正确的
原文: short, sports make our
批改:In a short -> In short (固定搭配) brillrance -> brilliance (拼写错误)
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14
同学,我想首先肯定你两点:第一,你具备了构建文章整体框架的意识;第二,你的思考能联系到社会生活水平、疫情等宏观背景,这是非常可贵的。
当前,影响你分数的最主要障碍是基础的词汇拼写和语法准确性。这导致你良好的构思无法被清晰、准确地表达出来。
为了帮助你有效提升,老师建议:
优先攻克核心词汇:请将复习重点放在最核心的写作词汇上,确保它们能够正确拼写和使用。在考场上,如果对某个单词的拼写没有绝对把握,可以换一个更简单但有把握的同义词。拼写正确远比使用生僻词重要。
理清段落内部逻辑:一个段落只集中表达一个核心意思。在写作时,先想好这个段落的中心句(topic sentence),然后所有的句子都围绕这个中心句展开,确保逻辑连贯。
写作后务必检查:完成作文后,如果时间允许,请务必通读一遍,专注于检查单词的基本拼写和句子的主谓宾结构是否完整。
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