考研英语一2011年大作文实例分析与批改

想在考研英语一大作文中写出有深度的论证段落？本文精解的2011年考研英语一真题范文，从论据选择、过渡句使用到结尾点题都极具参考价值。启航教育考研英语教研组对该篇范文的批注，有助于考生建立完善的写作逻辑。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

The cartoon provides us with a thought-provoking scene: there is a boat on the top of the picture, one person who is in front of the boat drive the boat. Two men, sitting on the boat, talk with each other happily, and throw the rubbish into the river. On the bottom of the picture, there are a host of rubbish on the surface of the river. The intended meaning of the drawing is quite evident: at no time should the folks underestimate the significance of the environment protecting.

There exist plenty of causes accounting for my opinion in various aspects. First of all, for instance, my hometown, a beautiful city, was committed to protect the environment, which brings it numerous honor names. During this period, we are all proud of our hometown. Furthermore, a rising number of individuals are coming to realization that the happiness of the people is strongly dependent on protecting the environment. In the end, if we ignore the importance of protecting environment, our society and nation would confronted with an unproming and fruitless future.

To sum up, by no means should we give up oureffects to protect environment. Parents and teachers can set a good example for children on protecting environment through their own behavior. In this way, hopefully, we may heve a better future.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：The cartoon provides us with a thought-provoking scene: there is a boat on the top of the picture, one person who is in front of the boat drive the boat.

批改：“drive”形式错误，主语“one person”是单数，应用“drives”。

原文：Two men, sitting on the boat, talk with each other happily, and throw the rubbish into the river.

批改：句子结构较清晰，描述了船上两人的行为。

原文：On the bottom of the picture, there are a host of rubbish on the surface of the river.

批改：表述存在语法错误，“there are a host of rubbish”中“rubbish”是不可数名词，不能用“are”

原文：The intended meaning of the drawing is quite evident: at no time should the folks underestimate the significance of the environment protecting.

批改：尝试解释漫画意图，但“environment protecting”表述错误，应为“environmental protection”。

原文：here exist plenty of causes accounting for my opinion in various aspects.

批改：没有语法问题

原文：First of all, for instance, my hometown, a beautiful city, was committed to protect the environment, which brings it numerous honor names.

批改：“was committed to protect”中“to”后应接动名词“protecting”

原文：During this period, we are all proud of our hometown.

批改：句子表述简单

原文：Furthermore, a rising number of individuals are coming to realization that the happiness of the people is strongly dependent on protecting the environment.

批改：“coming to realization”表述错误，应为“coming to realize”。

原文：In the end, if we ignore the importance of protecting environment, our society and nation would confronted with an unproming and fruitless future.

批改：“protecting environment”缺少“the”，“would confronted”表述错误，应为“would be confronted”，“unproming”拼写错误，应为“unpromising”。

原文：To sum up, by no means should we give up oureffects to protect environment.

批改：“oureffects”拼写错误，应为“our efforts”，“to protect environment”缺少“the”。

原文：Parents and teachers can set a good example for children on protecting environment through their own behavior.

批改：句子表述较清晰

原文：In this way, hopefully, we may heve a better future.

批改：“heve”拼写错误，应为“have”。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：10/20

题目要求：文章围绕给定漫画展开写作，基本完成了题目中描述漫画、解释意图和给出评论这三项核心任务。开篇对漫画中的船、人物及扔垃圾等场景进行了描述，中间部分阐述了漫画所传达的重视环保这一意图，结尾针对环保问题提出了建议并表达了期望，整体结构符合题目要求。

语言表达：文中存在多处语法错误，如“one person who is in front of the boat drive the boat”中“drive”形式错误；“there are a host of rubbish”中“rubbish”是不可数名词，不能用“are”；“was committed to protect”中“to”后应接动名词“protecting”等。这些错误严重影响了语言的准确性和表达的清晰度。

内容层面：在阐述环保的重要性时，列举了一些相关的观点，如家乡因保护环境获得荣誉、人们的幸福与保护环境相关等，试图从不同角度说明环保的意义。

修改建议：加强对语法知识的学习和巩固，写作后仔细检查语法错误。扩大词汇量，积累不同类型和层次的词汇，并根据语境准确运用。学习多种句式的运用，如定语从句、状语从句、宾语从句等，使文章句式更加丰富多样。

无论你是2026年考生还是备战2027考研英语，精读本文的2011年考研英语一批改范例都能为你的写作带来提升。启航教育的写作主讲与AI智能批改系统全天候待命，为你的考研英语一作文模板冲刺保驾护航。