启航教育在考研英语写作教学中反复强调:词汇与句式的高级化是考研英语作文高分的关键。本文整理的2011年考研英语一批改范例,几乎每一段都包含高分替换词与衔接词,是考研英语一大作文写作锦囊中的代表性范文。
一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目
考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文
As shown in the cartoon, there are two tourtists sitting on the
boat and throwing rubbish into the river, which pollutes the river. Evidently, the cartoonist intends to convey to readers that environmental protection is an issue that requires great attention both in
our personal lives and in society.
This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. On the one hand, while certain Chinese traditions may be outdated, the virtue of protect enviroument is one that should never lose its luster, as it is a crucial piece in shaping the admirable character of the Chinese people. On
the other hand, tragically, although the lack of clear rules and regulations might contribute to this phenomenon, its root cause lies in the fact that some individuals, in their pursuit of economic interests, have disregarded the virtue of protect environment.
How can we put an end to the problem of pollute environment? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including enhancing supervision and strengthening moral education. But would these measures be comprehensive. enough? In reality, we also need to Strengthen self-discrpline With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:tourtists
批改: 拼写错误 “tourtists”→“tourists”
原文:he boat
批改:② 冠词冗余 “the boat”→“a boat”(首次提 “一艘船” 无需特指)
原文: protect enviroument
批改:语法错误 ,拼写错误,“protect enviroument”→“protecting the environment”(介词 “of” 后接动名词,“environment” 需加定冠词 “the”,考研基础语法考点
原文:crucial piece
批改:词汇替换 “a crucial piece”→“a crucial element”(“element” 更贴合 “品质构成部分”,考研核心词汇)
原文:protect environment
批改:语法错误 “protect environment”→“environmental protection”
原文:How can we put an end to the problem of pollute environment?
批改:修改后:How can we put an end to environmental pollution? 修改原因:① 语法错误 “pollute environment”→“environmental pollution”(名词短语作宾语,考研核心搭配);② 简化表达 “the problem of” 冗余(“environmental pollution” 直接作宾语,更简洁) 而且:of后应该加doing形式
原文:Strengthen self-discrpline
批改:① 大小写错误 “Strengthen”→“strengthen”(句中动词无需大写);② 拼写错误 “self-discrpline”→“self-discipline”(考研高频词汇,拼写需准确)
原文:But would these measures be comprehensive. enough?
批改:标点错误 “.”→“?”(疑问句结尾需用问号,考研基础格式考点);② 时态优化 “would”→“are”(客观询问措施是否全面,用一般现在时更贴合考研议论文语境)。
原文:With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue at its core
批改:建议:① 词汇优化 “these measures”→“these combined efforts”(呼应前文 “监管 + 德育 + 自律”,逻辑更连贯,“combined efforts” 是考研高分词汇);② 词汇替换 “tackle”→“address”(两者均为考研核心词,“address” 更贴合 “解决问题” 的正式语境)
原文:both in our personal lives and in society
批改:注意段落格式
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:14/20
对每一位2027考研人而言,考研英语一大作文都是冲刺阶段必须攻克的难关。启航教育陪伴一届又一届学子走向考研英语写作高分,本文精解的2011年考研英语一范文正是经典参考之一。欢迎关注启航教育,了解更多考研英语备考干货。
【28考研辅导课程推荐】:28考研集训课程,VIP领学计划,28考研VIP全科定制套餐(公共课VIP+专业课1对1) , 这些课程中都会配有内部讲义以及辅导书和资料,同时会有教研教辅双师模式对大家进行教学以及督学,并配有24小时答疑和模拟测试等,可直接咨询在线客服老师领取大额优惠券。
热门下载
资料下载
院校解析
真题解析
考研数学
考研英语
考研政治
考研备考