启航教育作为考研英语培训领域的知名品牌,每年都会整理发布当年的启航考研英语高分范文。本文呈现的2024年考研英语二大作文批改例文中,每一处失分点都已被老师精准订正,是2027考生不可错过的写作资料。
一、2024年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the chart below. In your essay, you should1) describe and interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. Write your answer in about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2024年考研英语二大作文批改例文
The line chart clearly displays the percentage breakd own of various unniversity studengts about pacitice that doing job. learning some konwlge akes the lead at 91.3%,followed by doing at 84.8%.Additionally,factors such as working with orther and making happy are also considered, accounting for 32.6%, and 54.4%,respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with,as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound doing job system, enabling our students to have ample opportunities for further education. What is more , An increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of changes, challenges and chances, doing job is in dispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run. Last but no least, As we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people’s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to doing job.
What about future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truth fully reflect the choices of doing job,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era , and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:y displays the percentage breakd own of various unniversity studengts about pacitice that doing job. learning some konwlge akes the lead at 91.3%,followed by doing at 84.8%.Additionally,factors su
批改:breakd own -> breakdown (构成一个词) unniversity -> university studengts -> students pacitice -> practices (建议使用更准确的词,如 activities) konwlge -> knowledge orther -> others
原文:king with orther and making happy are also considered, accounting for 32.6%, and 54.4%,resp
批改:learning some konwlge akes the lead -> Acquiring knowledge takes the lead (动词用 Acquiring 更正式,akes 改正为 takes) followed by doing at 84.8%:doing 指代不清。从上下文看,可能是指“获得实践经验”,建议改为 gaining practical experience。
原文:displays the percentage breakd own of various unniversity studengts about pacitice that doing job. learning some konwlge akes the lead at 91.3%,followed by doing at 84.8%.Additionally,factors such as working with orther and making happy are also considered, accounting for 32.6%, and 54.4%,respectively.
批改:第一段的任务是客观描述图表信息。你抓住了几个主要数据,这很好!但目前段落的拼写和用词问题影响了信息的准确传递。通过修正这些细节,可以让描述变得更加清晰
原文:dispensable
批改:in dispensable -> indispensable (构成一个词)
原文:ctor orchestrating the symphony of changes, our government has made tremendous efforts to build a sound doing job system, enabling our students to have ample opportunities for further education. What is more , An increasing number of young people believe that in modern society full of changes, challenges and chances, doing job is in dispensable if they wish to achieve success in the long run. Last but no least, As we all know, the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people’s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to doing job.
批改:第二段旨在分析原因,你成功建立了三个论点的框架,这是很大的优点!特别是尝试联系社会背景(如疫情),让分析更有深度
原文:th fully
批改:truth fully -> truthfully (构成一个词)
原文:t future trends? I am confident that the above statistical figures accurately and truth fully reflect the choices of doing job,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era , and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
批改:结尾段简洁地预测了未来趋势,并再次点题
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:11
总评与修改建议:
同学,你的作文展现了很好的潜力!结构完整,逻辑清晰,还使用了一些高级词汇和复杂的句子结构,这些都是非常值得肯定的。
如果要让你的作文再上一个台阶,老师建议你重点关注以下三个方面:
基础准确性:请特别留意单词的拼写。在完成作文后,如果时间允许,建议快速通读一遍
用词的具体性:尽量避免反复使用 doing job 这样宽泛的表达。试着在不同语境下使用更具体的词汇,比如 acquiring knowledge, gaining experience, career preparation, professional development 等。这能大大增加你作文的词汇丰富度。
逻辑的紧密度:在提出每一个原因时,可以多问自己一句“这和图表数据有最直接的关系吗?”,确保每一个论点都牢牢地服务于主题。
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