考研英语一2011年大作文考了什么？附真题回顾及例文批改

启航教育作为考研英语培训领域的知名品牌，每年都会整理发布当年的考研英语作文模板高分范文。本文呈现的2011年考研英语一大作文批改例文中，每一处失分点都已被老师精准订正，是2027考生不可错过的写作资料。

一、考研英语一2011年大作文题目

考研英语一2011年大作文Directions:Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should1) describe the drawing briefly,2) explain its intended meaning, and3) give your comments.You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

二、考研英语一2011年大作文批改例文

paints a bright future, while avoiding challenges is tne

mon

11(一)大

必须使用黑色字迹书写:在答题卡区域内作答,超出黑色矩形边框限定区域的答案无效。

As shown in the picture, there are two tourists, sitting on a boat, enjoying the beautiful view and throwing rubbish into a river, which made the river dirty.Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.

This phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, behaviors that destroy the environment can damage personal image and reputation, leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situations. What is more, environmental pollution is like a heavy chain that hinders nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image.

How can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution ? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including issuing related laws and enhancing supervision. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue as its core.

必须使用黑色字迹书写:在答题卡区域内作答,超出黑色矩形边框限定区域的答案无效,

第页

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：which made the river

批改：which made the river dirty” 中的 “made” (过去时) 与主句的 “are”, “sitting”, “enjoying”, “throwing” (现在时) 时态不一致。描述图画内容时，通常使用一般现在时。

原文：shown in the picture, there are two tourists, sitting on a boat, enjoying the beautiful view and throwing rubbish into a river, which made the river dirty.Evidently, the picture intends to convey to readers that environmental pollution is an issue that requires great attention both in our personal lives and in society.

批改：内容与逻辑： 本段准确地描述了图画的核心内容（游客行为及其后果），并清晰地揭示了图画的寓意，逻辑顺畅，完成了段落任务。

原文：nation"s progress

批改： “nation"s progress” 前面缺少定冠词 “the”。

原文：s phenomenon is thought-provoking in several ways, but two of them are particularly significant. First and foremost, behaviors that destroy the environment can damage personal image and reputation, leading to exclusion and failure in work and social situations. What is more, environmental pollution is like a heavy chain that hinders nation"s progress, not only hindering its ability to maintain healthy and rapid growth, but also significantly affecting its international image.

批改：内容与逻辑： 本段从个人和国家两个层面论证，结构清晰。第一个论点（损害个人形象）切入点很好，；第二个论点（阻碍国家发展）立意高远，逻辑合理。 语言表达： 词汇运用有一定广度，但精准度有待提高。存在个别语法错误（缺少冠词）。句式有变化，尝试使用了并列结构，值得肯定。

原文：issue as its cor

批改：结尾句 “tackle the issue as its core” 是严重错误，正确搭配为 “tackle the issue at its core” (从其核心入手解决)。

原文： can we put an end to the problem of environmental pollution ? It is suggested by many that we need a package deal, including issuing related laws and enhancing supervision. But would these measures be comprehensive enough? In reality, we also need to strengthen self-discipline. With the support of these measures, we can effectively tackle the issue as its core.

批改：本段结构完整，提出了“法律法规”和“自我约束”两种措施，思路正确。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：14分

总评

这篇作文较好地完成了试题规定的任务。文章结构严谨，三段式布局合理，内容切题，从描述、论证到提出解决方案，逻辑线索清晰。能使用一些复杂的句式和词汇。主要问题在于 语言的精准度，包括用词的选择、固定搭配的掌握。这些细节上的失误阻止了文章进入更高分数。

2. 修改建议：

提升用词精准度： 多积累同义词和地道搭配。尤其要牢记“at its core”这类固定搭配。

优化句子结构： 在描述图画时，尝试使用更动态、多样的句式，避免“there be”句型的滥用和逗号的过度连接。

加强论证的严谨性： 在展开论点时，避免使用过于绝对化（如“必然导致失败”）的推导，让论证更符合常理，从而更具说服力。

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