本文精选了一篇得分13分以上的2011年考研英语二大作文高分范例,并附启航老师对该范文的逐句批改。文中清晰展示了考研英语写作技巧评分细则中关于语法多样性、词汇丰富度与逻辑连贯性的得分技巧,是考研英语学习的高价值内容。
一、考研英语二2011年大作文题目
考研英语二2011年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart and 2) give your comments. You should write at least 150 words. Write your essay on ANSWER SHEET 2. (15 points)
二、考研英语二2011年大作文批改例文
The bar chart clearly depicts the various car selling during 2008 and 2009 in Chinese market. In 2008, the percentage of Chinese car was 20% but by 2009, the percentage had clearly increased to 33%. In contrast, the percentage of Japanese car experienced a declined of 6 % from 2008 to 2009. Meanwhile, American car slowly increased 1%.
The core reason for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows. To start with, Chinese society is undergoing an extensive and profound transformation. In my view, the fundamental reason for this phenomenon is the significant progress made by China"s manufacturing industry in responding to these changes. That"s why Chinese residents prefer Chinese car rather than Japanese car in rencent years. In addition, against the backdrop of our country"s rapid and dynamic development, the younger genaration, particularly those born in 1990s and 2000s, are accustomed to using domestic cars and have become the primary consumer group. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsuprising.
What about future trends? I"m confident that the percentage of Chinese car will steadily increase in the following decades. In contrast, the percentage of Japanese car will likely continue to decrease.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:the various car selling
批改:此处表达的要更具体一点,为不同汽车品牌的市场占比的变化,重点是变化,且要把占比或者份额表示出来,改为 the changes in market shares of certain brands
原文:car
批改:可数名词单数形式不能单独存在,改为 cars
原文: 20%
批改:数字表达要准确,为 25%,记得加逗号
原文: car
批改:改为 cars
原文:declined
批改:此处为名词,改为 decline
原文:6 %
批改:数字的表达要精准,改为 about 10%
原文: Chinese
批改:改为 the Chinese ,特指"中国市场"这个整体概念
原文:American car
批改:改为 the percentage of American cars
原文:slowly increased 1%
批改:此处和其它两个比较为 remained stable and steady ,最重要的是写出变化趋势
批改:开头段表达不错,清晰地阐述了图表内容,但是要注意语法错误和数字表达的准确性
原文:reason
批改:下列好几个原因,此处为复数,改为 reasons
批改:语法正确,表达也很好
批改:语法正确
原文:unsuprising
批改:unsurprising
批改:内容表达很好,也很具体
原文:car
批改:改为 cars
原文:Japanese car
批改:此处可改为 Japanese and American cars 将其它两个品牌写全,重点表示的是 国产汽车受欢迎,外国品牌没有那么受欢迎了
批改:结尾段内容表达不错
原文: car
批改:改为 cars
原文:car
批改:改为 cars
原文:rencent
批改:recent
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:10分/ 15分
题目要求:总体上来说是切题的,表明的个人观点与图表的内容是贴合的
语言表达:存在几处语法和拼写问题,词汇表达不错,一些句式表达也很好
结构逻辑:文章的结构完整清晰,内容也比较丰富具体, 但是首段数字的表达一定要准确
修改建议:1. 语法问题结合作文批注仔细修改 2. 拼写要细心 3. 数字表达要准确,之后可以多积累素材,自己多练练句子,进一步丰富自己的句式和观点储备,提高自己的语言表达,总的来说写的不错,加油!
本文精解的2011年考研英语二范文,在启航教育AI智能批改系统中拿到了高分评价。快速揪出失分点,对着薄弱点学提升更快,是考研英语写作技巧备考的贴心帮手。扫码预约,免费体验考研英语作文AI智能批改。
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