2015年考研英语二大作文真题与例文批改

2015年考研英语二大作文属于典型的图表作文，要求考生准确描述数据变化并深入解读现象。本文精解的这篇饼图批改范例，完整覆盖考研英语二写作冲刺常考图表的描述思路，是考研英语图表类作文的标杆范例。

一、2015年考研英语二大作文题目

考研英语二2015年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)

二、2015年考研英语二大作文批改例文

The pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of spend during the Spring Festival among people in our country percent.New years gifts take the lead at40%,followed by traffic,gathering and dinning and other ,both accounting for20%.

The core reasons for the observed Phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of chagnes,our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the puchasing power of the populace,allowing them to afford presents that were preuously deemed luxury items. In addition,Chinese society is undagoing on extensive and profund transformation. In my view,the fundamental reason for this Phenomenon is the signifiant progress made by China"s economic in responding to these changes. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.

What abont future trends? I am confident that the above statistcal figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of young poople,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文：breakdown of spend during the Spring Festival among people in our country percent.New

批改：breakdown of spend -> breakdown of spending (词性错误，介词后应为名词或动名词) among people in our country percent：此部分表意不清且多余，图表标题已说明是某市居民，可删除。

原文：rs gifts take the lead at40

批改：New years gifts -> New Year"s gifts (所有格错误) at40% -> at 40% (缺少空格)

原文：ffic,gathering and dinnin

批改：traffic,gathering and dinning and other -> transportation, gatherings and dining, and other expenses (用词不当，traffic 指交通流量，transportation 指出行；dinning 拼写错误；列举不清晰)

原文：e pie chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of spend during the Spring Festival among people in our country percent.New years gifts take the lead at40%,followed by traffic,gathering and dinning and other ,both accounting for20%.

批改：本段准确地列出了图表中的关键数据。主要问题在于语言

原文： Phenome

批改：Phenomenon -> phenomenon (普通名词，在句中不应大写)

原文：puchasing power of the populace,allowing them to afford presents that were preuously deemed luxury items. In additio

批改：puchasing -> purchasing (拼写错误) preuously -> previously (拼写错误) undagoing on -> undergoing an (拼写和介词错误)

原文：nd profund transformation. In my view,the fundamental reason for this Phenomenon is the signifiant progress made by China"s economic in responding to these changes

批改：profund -> profound (拼写错误) signifiant -> significant (拼写错误) China"s economic -> China"s economy (词性错误，应用名词)

原文：e core reasons for the observed Phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with, as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of chagnes,our government has made tremendous efforts to drive economic growth and elevate the puchasing power of the populace,allowing them to afford presents that were preuously deemed luxury items. In addition,Chinese society is undagoing on extensive and profund transformation. In my view,the fundamental reason for this Phenomenon is the signifiant progress made by China"s economic in responding to these changes. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprisi

批改：本段是主要失分点。虽然试图分析原因，但存在密集的拼写错误

原文：bove statistcal figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of young poople,ser

批改：abont -> about (拼写错误) statistcal -> statistical (拼写错误) young poople -> young people (拼写错误)

原文：at abont future trends? I am confident that the above statistcal figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choice of young poople,serving as a microcosm of the changes in the era and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades

批改：结尾段对未来的预测合理，且使用了高级词汇。但出现了多处拼写错误

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：总分与总评

总体得分：8分

：基本完成了试题规定的任务，包含了多数内容要点（主要是第一段的数据描述）。但未能有效阐述内容要点（第二段的分析完全无效），且有很多语法及词汇错误，影响了理解。

总评：

同学，你好！这篇作文让我们需要集中关注两个最核心的问题：论述相关与语言的准确。

1. 语言方面：

当前最迫切的任务是提升基础拼写的准确率。文中出现了大量高频词汇的拼写错误，这严重阻碍了意义的传达。请务必在写作后投入时间进行逐词检查，确保核心词汇的拼写万无一失。这是当前阶段取得进步的关键。

2. 结构方面：

你具备了基本的结构意识。但内容的有效性被第二段完全偏离的论述方向严重拖累。分析必须紧扣图表所反映的具体现象，而非套用宏大、空泛的模板。

总的修改建议：

请立即着手建立并巩固核心词汇库（如 spending, phenomenon, statistical, people）。写完后，请专注于检查拼写。

紧扣主题：在分析春节花销时，彻底放弃“政府指挥交响乐”、“社会深刻变革”这类不相关的套话。从“文化传统（送礼）”、“情感纽带（团聚）”、“社交活动（聚餐）”等直接相关的角度思考原因。

保持优势：你使用“microcosm”这样的高级词汇和进行趋势预测的意识是很好的。

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