当你坐在考研英语一考场,面对2024年大作文题目的那一瞬间,是否能快速组织起一篇结构清晰、表达地道的高分文章?本文这篇批改例文,正是考研英语一真题话题下的标准范本,适合每一位考研英语备考生反复研读。
一、考研英语一2024年大作文题目
考研英语一2024年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the picture and the chart below. In your essay, you should 1) describe the picture and the chart briefly, 2) interpret the implied meaning, and 3) give your comments. Write your answer in 160-200 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)
二、考研英语一2024年大作文批改例文
In the left-hand cartoon,there is a boy, standing in the park entrance and saying,"The newly nearby park is nice!". Simultaneously, in the right-hand chart,the number of parks experienced a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build some parks, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for exercise. In addition, as we all know,the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health.Considering these factors,the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends?I am confident that the number of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:eft-hand cartoon,there is a boy, standing in the park entrance and saying,"The newly nearby park is nice!". Simultaneously, in the right-hand chart,the number of parks experienced a significant increase of 264 from 2020 to 2022.
批改:你成功抓住了两幅图的核心信息,并进行了对比描述,这很好
原文: reasons for the observed phenomenon can be summarized as follows.To start with,as the conductor orchestrating the symphony of changes,our government has made tremendous efforts to build some parks, enabling citizens to have ample opportunities for exercise. In addition, as we all know,the outbreak of COVID-19 has impacted every aspect of our lives, significantly altering people"s behaviors and choices. Consequently, an increasing number of individuals have started paying more attention to health.Considering these factors,the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:你从政府行为和公共事件两个角度分析原因,思路正确
原文:t about future trends?I am confident that the number of parks will steadily increase in the following decades.
批改:你对未来趋势做出了明确的预测
原文:earby park is nic
批改:newly nearby park" 词序不当,建议改为 "newly-built nearby park"。 "chart" 使用不准确,漫画应为 "cartoon",图表可用 "chart/graph"。
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:15
总评:
你的作文结构清晰,能够结合两幅图进行描述和分析,并运用了生动的比喻,展现了不错的语言潜力。当前,提升的关键在于强化论证逻辑的严密性和结论的充实度。
修改建议:
你的作文框架很清晰。下一步,建议你特别关注“因果逻辑”的紧密性。在写完每个原因后,可以问自己一句:“所以呢?”,确保原因能直接、有力地推导出结果。
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