考研英语作文失分点多、提分空间大,一直是2013年考研英语二备考生核心痛点之一。本文围绕考研英语二大作文话题,给出一篇经过启航教育老师精细批改的高分范文,文中不仅有逐句批注,还附有可复制的考研英语二高分写作模板。
一、2013年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2013年大作文Directions:Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should 1) interpret the chart, and 2) give your comments. You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET. (15 points)
二、2013年考研英语二大作文批改例文
2013年大作文:
The bar chart clearly displays the percentage breakdown of part time employment situation of students in a certain university. Senior student takes the lead at 88.24%. Additionally, factors such as third year students, sophomore students and freshman students are also considered,accounting for 71.93%,71.13%,and 67.77%,respectively.
The core reasons for the observed phenomenon can be can be summarized as follows. To start with, senior students are about to graduate, with fewer curses and ample free time, so part-time jobs have become their choice. In addition, students need to pay tuition fees, textbook fees, and their own living expenses to the school. These expenses are divided into multiple parts, and they want to reduce the burden on their families and themselves. This has led many students to choose part-time jobs. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
What about future trends? I am confident that that the above statistical figures accurately and truthfully reflect the choices of students, and will likely remain relatively stable in the following decades.
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:part time employment situation of students
批改:表述不对哦,of students taking part-time jobs
原文:tudent
批改:表述不对哦,学生和比例无法搭配,这是中英文的差异,要把比例写出来。The percentage of senior students taking part-time jobs
原文:such as third year students, sophomore students and freshman students ar
批改:这句也不是很适当哦。
原文:enior student takes the lead at 88.24%. Additionally, factors such as third year students, sophomore students and freshman students are also considered,accounting for 71.93%,71.13%,and 67.77%,respectively.
批改:表述需要区分中英文差异哦,一些表述可以这样写:In the freshman year, the percentage of students taking part-time jobs was 67.77%, but by the junior year, this rate had gradually risen to 71.93%. In contrast, the proportion of students doing part-time jobs experienced a significant increase of 16.31% from the junior year to the senior year.
原文:curse
批改:courses
原文:ch
批改:university比较好,school一般是高中以下
原文:dents are about to graduate, with fewer curses and ample free time, so part-time jobs have become their choice. In addition, students need to pay tuition fees, textbook fees, and their own living expenses to the school. These expenses are divided into multiple parts, and they want to reduce the burden on their families and themselves. This has led many students to choose part-time jobs. Considering these factors, the depicted phenomenon in the chart is unsurprising.
批改:内容比较贴合题意,符合现实,讨论分析比较到位,句子结构完整,
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:9/15
语法:语法上注意Chinglish表述,第一段的数据比例表述没有区分中英文表达习惯差异哦,可以多看一些原汁原味的英文文章。
逻辑:整体逻辑可以的,第二段很通顺。
词汇:单词整体还行,但是还有一些错的,注意一些词汇使用的适当性哦。
内容:内容比较符合英文作文写作要求,结构合理。内容还是比较符合英文写作要求的。
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