2021年考研英语一大作文失分点批改

本文精选了一篇得分13分以上的2021年考研英语一大作文高分范例，并附启航老师对该范文的逐句批改。文中清晰展示了考研英语写作锦囊评分细则中关于语法多样性、词汇丰富度与逻辑连贯性的得分技巧，是考研英语学习的高价值内容。

一、2021年考研英语一大作文题目

考研英语一2021年大作文52. Directions: Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the picture below. In your essay, you should1)describe the picture briefly, 2)interpret the implied meaning, and 3)give your comments. Write your answer on the ANSWER SHEET. (20 points)

二、2021年考研英语一大作文批改例文

The picture shows a child dressed in traditional opera costume, holding a prop stick. He tells his father that "many classmates think learning opera is not fun." His father reply, "Don’t you like it yourself? That’s enough."

In the image, the kid wears a costume like those opera performers wear, looking a bit upset as his classmates don’t think his hobby is interesting. This scene conveys an important meaning: we should stick to our own interests, regardless of others’ opinions. Also, it relates to the inheritance of traditional culture—learning opera is a way to pass on traditional art, but many young people may not interested in it.

For one thing, when we have a hobby we love, we shouldn’t give it up just because others dislike it. Our own passion are the most important; they drive us to keep going. For another, traditional art forms like opera need young people to learn and inherit them. If more kids follow their interest in opera, these art form will not fade away. Besides, parents’ support is crucial, just like the father in the picture encourage his son to stick to his hobby.

In short, we should value our own interests and contribute to preserving traditional culture.

三、考研英语作文批改

原文： picture shows a child dressed in traditional opera costume, holding a prop stick. He tells his father that "many classmates think learning opera is not fun." His father reply, "Don’t you like it yourself? That’s enough."

批改：开篇对图画的描述非常清晰、准确。对于对话的转述也很好地抓住了核心冲突

原文：ther reply

批改：主语是第三人称单数，谓语动词建议使用 “replies”

原文：the image, the kid wears a costume like those opera performers wear, looking a bit upset as his classmates don’t think his hobby is interesting. This scene conveys an important meaning: we should stick to our own interests, regardless of others’ opinions. Also, it relates to the inheritance of traditional culture—learning opera is a way to pass on traditional art, but many young people may not interested in it.

批改：这一段成功地从描述过渡到深层含义的阐释，点出了“坚持自我”和“文化传承”两个关键点

原文：y not interested

批改：may not interested in it” 这个结构中，情态动词 “may” 后面需要接动词原形 “be”，所以建议改为 “may not be interested in it”。

原文：r one thing, when we have a hobby we love, we shouldn’t give it up just because others dislike it. Our own passion are the most important; they drive us to keep going. For another, traditional art forms like opera need young people to learn and inherit them. If more kids follow their interest in opera, these art form will not fade away. Besides, parents’ support is crucial, just like the father in the picture encourage his son to stick to his hobby.

批改：本段从三个层面展开论证，论点清晰，说理充分，并且使用了“For one thing... For another... Besides...”这样地道的连接词，非常棒！“fade away”这个词组也用得很贴切。

原文：n passion are

批改：主语 “passion” 是不可数名词，所以谓语动词建议使用 “is”。

原文：hese art form w

批改： “these” 后面需要接名词复数 “forms”

原文：n the picture encourage his

批改：最后一句“just like the father... encourage...” ， “like” 在这里是介词，后面引导的是一个短语而非完整的句子，所以动词 “encourage” 建议改为非谓语形式 “encouraging”。

四、考研英语作文评分

得分：15

你的作文内容切题，结构严谨，论证充分，并成功使用了高级词汇和复杂句式。主要的提升空间在于语法细节的精准度，如主谓一致和名词单复数。

总评与建议：

同学，你这篇作文最让老师欣赏的是你清晰的逻辑和深刻的立意。你能从一幅简单的图画中，挖掘出个人兴趣与文化传承的双重主题，并能用流畅的结构进行论证。

当前，我们可以集中精力提升语法的精细度。你的句子结构和词汇选择都很好，但一些小的语法点（如主谓一致、名词单复数）影响了表达的精准性。我的核心建议是：

建立语法检查意识：在完成初稿后，可以专门花一分钟时间，快速扫描文中的动词（检查时态和单复数）和名词（检查可数/不可数及单复数），这能帮你避免大部分小失误。

本文精解的2021年考研英语一范文，在启航教育AI智能批改系统中拿到了高分评价。快速揪出失分点，对着薄弱点学提升更快，是考研英语写作锦囊备考的贴心帮手。扫码预约，免费体验考研英语作文AI智能批改。