备战2014年考研英语大作文,先从研读经典高分范文开始。本文汇集的启航教育批改范文中,不仅有原文、批注,还有词汇注释与亮点解析。准备2027考研的同学,可联系启航教育在线咨询考研英语二写作高分规划。
一、2014年考研英语二大作文题目
考研英语二2014年大作文Write an essay based on the following chart. In your writing, you should1) interpret the chart, and2) give your comments.You should write about 150 words on the ANSWER SHEET.
二、2014年考研英语二大作文批改例文
必须使用黑色字迹书写:在答题卡区场内作答,想出黑色矩形边权限定区域的答案无效, What is profoundly demonstrated in the above column chart is that dramatic changes have taken place in the changes of the amount of the townfolks and rural people during 1990 from 2010 in China. The number of townfolks has increased from 300 million in 1990 to 666 million in 2010. When shifting the focus to rural people, there is a slowdown during the same period,though at a slower rate than that of townfolks.
The situation can be traced to a multitude of factors. Firstly, with the economy sustainably developing and living standard steadily improving, townfolks is playing a big role in our daily life. They build for social construction. Secondly, strenuous efforts are made by government to promote the population of people. The implementation of numerous relevant policies, such as Three-year Action Plan for promoting population growth, has made this trend more pronounced. Lastly, there is no doubt that personal choices are of great importance.
Accordingly, It can be predicted that with the collaboration of the government and individuals, this trend will definitely continue in the forthcoming years. We, the young generations. should grasp the pulse of this trend and meet whatever challenges it may bring about.
必须使用黑色字迹书写:在答题卡区域内作答,超出黑色矩形边框限定区域的答案无效,
三、考研英语作文批改
原文:during 1990 from 2010
批改:during 1990 from 2010 是错误表达,应改为 from 1990 to 2010
原文:n the changes of the amount of
批改:in the changes of the changes of the amount 表达重复啰嗦,可简化为 in the population sizes of...。
原文:oundly demonstrated in the above column chart is that dramatic changes have taken place in the changes of the amount of the townfolks and rural people during 1990 from 2010 in China. The number of townfolks has increased from 300 million in 1990 to 666 million in 2010. When shifting the focus to rural people, there is a slowdown during the same period,though at a slower rate than that of townfolks.
批改:本段指出了城乡人口的变化趋势
原文:ownfolks i
批改:townfolks is 主谓不一致,应为 townfolks are。但更建议使用 urban population,其后的动词用 is。
原文: to promote the population of pe
批改:to promote the population of people 表意错误。图表反映的是人口分布(城乡转移)的变化,而非人口总数的增长。政府推动的是“城市化(urbanization)”而非“人口增长(population growth)”。所举的“三年行动计划”例子与主题完全无关。
原文:personal choices are of
批改:personal choices are of great importance 观点正确但过于空洞,没有展开说明具体是什么选择(如去城市寻求更多工作机会、更好教育和医疗等)。
原文:he situation can be traced to a multitude of factors. Firstly, with the economy sustainably developing and living standard steadily improving, townfolks is playing a big role in our daily life. They build for social construction. Secondly, strenuous efforts are made by government to promote the population of people. The implementation of numerous relevant policies, such as Three-year Action Plan for promoting population growth, has made this trend more pronounced. Lastly, there is no doubt that personal choices are of great importance.
批改:本段是文章的主要失分点。所给出的原因(如政府促进人口增长)与图表现象(城镇化)有些脱节
原文:, It ca
批改:It 首字母不应大写。
原文:We, the you
批改:We, the young generations. 句号使用错误
原文:cordingly, It can be predicted that with the collaboration of the government and individuals, this trend will definitely continue in the forthcoming years. We, the young generations. should grasp the pulse of this trend and meet whatever challenges it may bring about.
批改:结尾段给出了预测和号召,结构意识好
四、考研英语作文评分
得分:11分
语言方面:
你尝试使用复杂句式和高级词汇(如profoundly, multitude, implementation)的意愿很好!但文中出现了一些关键的用词错误(如townfolks, promote the population of people)和语法错误,这些错误直接影响了意思的准确传达结构方面:
三段式的思路是对的。但核心问题出在第二段的论述严重偏离了主题。图表明明展示的是“城镇化”(人口从乡村流向城市),而你分析的原因却是“政府促进人口增长”,这好比是“南辕北辙”,导致整个评论部分的说服力大打折扣。未来审题时,一定要确保你分析的“原因”和图表展示的“结果”是直接相关的。
总的修改建议:
建议你重写第二段。围绕“城镇化”这一核心概念,从以下角度思考原因:
经济动力:城市有更多就业机会、更高收入。
社会服务:城市能提供更优质的教育、医疗等公共资源。
政策引导:政府推动的正是“城市化”建设,而非“人口增长”
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